this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2025
805 points (98.7% liked)
Microblog Memes
7389 readers
2547 users here now
A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.
Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.
Rules:
- Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
- Be nice.
- No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
- Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.
Related communities:
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
My parents met by getting introduced to each other in what's effectively an arranged marriage. Well, technically, it was not forced per se, but the village elders and/or their parents pressured it, they show photos, then they were pressured to agree to an arranged meeting, y'all talk to each other. The elders verify your 时辰八字 (some astrology stuff) to verify "compatibility". Then if y'all like each other, the marriage happens. From what my mother told me, they could refuse, but then their parents / village elders just keep trying to find a new partner for you. Marriage is an expectation. 🤷♂️
This was like 1990's, Guangdong Province, People's Republic of China.
My parents are still trying to do arranged arranged marriage for my older brother (we live in the USA now) because my mother is afraid he wouldn't find a spouse. He doesn't seem to care about marriage either.
As for how my parents relationships are, I don't think they really "love" each other, they kinda just put up with each other "for the kids". When they do get in arguments, it can be quite terrifying, especially when I was still in K-12 school.
There's like this expectation for you to get married early and have kids. (My older brother is many years older then me, and he's is approaching 30 years old)
My reaction to this shit, is: I don't wanna get married lol. I hate the idea of living with another human being. I never have any desires for romantic relationships. I wanna live and die alone. (And especially, fuck arranged marriages, ain't doing that shit, rather be single than miserable. Not having one of the most important choices be dictated by parents.)
(Btw, I'm not even supposed to be born. My mother disobeyed the One Child Policy and gave birth to me)
As someone who is living in a non-arranged marriage, if it turns out well, a relationship can be quite magical.
It just sucks how dating looks like today, but if it works out, it is worth all of the shit.
Rejection is painful precisely because genuine connections are so desirable. The tension, the drama, and the luck-of-the-draw of dating is both what makes it miserable and exciting. Nice to see other interesting people and to be seen as interesting to others.
Happy for you and everyone else who had it worked out. But that's not the case for many.
If I knew then what I know now, I'd not have picked the man who fathered my kids. I love those kids, but... Different father would make different kids. But maybe their lives would be better.
Possibly no man, no kids would have been better all in all.
.
Right on, dude 🤘 Your entire existence is a rebellion so you might as well go the whole hog and live your way