this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2023
47 points (92.7% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26701 readers
1702 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics.


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

For those who might ask "What does that even mean?", this is what I'm reading that triggered the question: https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/transformative-experience/

Recent can mean the most recent you can remember, even if it was years ago. Interested in what y'all might say.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Started dating for the first time, experiencing genuine love for the first time, and breaking up and experience genuine sorrow for the first time about two years ago.

And cats. I adopted cats.

[โ€“] Cracks_InTheWalls@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Genuine sorrow hurts, but my god if it isn't a fascinating and powerful state. It's 100% transformative, in a good way, if you allow it to be. Sorrow and the journey back, imo, is a vital trial in human development, all the more interesting because it's truly universal. The risk is so hardening yourself against pain that it's detrimental, the prize is a deeper capacity for empathy.

To love, and to lose, and to find your way back to love again - it doesn't feel this way in the slough of despond*, but on the other end and with some time it's a beautiful thing.

(*General statement - if you want to think more on this whole transformative experience thing in general, you could do worse than reading The Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan. If you're vehemently anti-Christian you'll need to replace Yahweh, Sky Wizard (tm) with your own conceptions, but the allegory itself still provides some palatable food for thought)