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I took a lower-paying job that I was more competent to do.
Due to lower stress levels, somehow I spend less money and my finances are way better. For the record we’re talking about making $110k then vs making $45k now.
My finances are in better shape. I have cognitive surplus at the end of the day, and I think maybe that’s translating to less escape-seeking.
Also, this year I made a new year’s resolution: I am going to have $5k in the bank, come hell or high water. I’ve lived my whole life without a buffer and life without a buffer sucks so hard.
Just having that goal — $5k in the bank — has changed my whole relationship to money. I haven’t even hit the $5k. I’m at $3k and even that feels amazing. It doesn’t matter if my paycheck is late. I can just pay my rent. Moving into a new apartment and the agent was like “are you prepared to pay a deposit and first month today?” and I was like “yup”.
In the past I’d always answer like “Well my next paycheck is on such and such date and can I maybe pay you half then, then the other half two weeks after that?” I was always relying on the flexibility and mercy of financial gatekeepers.
I’m amazed how such a small amount of money (compared to the total flow) being held onto has changed my perception of myself. I feel like a “legit” person now. I feel like a stakeholder in society. I feel like an adult, instead of a boy in a man’s body. I don’t even know when my paydays are any more.
And my income didn’t really increase between the time I had no buffer and the time I did. I just made the resolution, and then started putting money away.
I think your experience that your finances are better on $45k than $110k is quite mysterious and could do with some further elucidation
I agree. I'd love it if I could take a less demanding job. Burnout sucks and I would love to have more time for my family and hobbies.
I just can't see how that would work between paying my home loan and other living expenses.