this post was submitted on 07 Oct 2023
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I don't tell my coworkers my birthday because everyone makes a big deal out of it, or celebrates it.
But for me, I can no longer shake the thought of "goddamn, should I celebrate because I survived one more year, or celebrate because the likelihood of death has come that much closer."
So it kind of makes me in a twisted mood on my birthday where I'd rather just like to eat and play video games uninterrupted. My first birthday being single is coming up so I don't even get to do the usual joke to my ex "what no birthday blowjob?"
I don't like birthdays. As a kid they were awesome until my dad decided those candles that don't go out would be funny on my 13th. After that I realized birthday's are just a stupid way of gauging our physical and mental capabilities. 20 years later and it feels the same
I live out of spite so I do birthdays. Join us on the spite side, we have cake.
What's the deal with the candles that don't go out? Not sure I understand.
https://youtu.be/W93XyXHI8Nw
This video by Kurzgesagt sorta changed my outlook on that exact feeling. Looking back things tend to be less dire and we process that as things being continually worse when it's more of a case of rosy retrospection.