this post was submitted on 13 Oct 2023
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I always blame mine on the cat.
I blame mine on the hamsters.
I had to gradually buy about 95 to make it seem plausible but I got there in the end.
The great thing that 95 hamsters and farting so much that you need 95 hamsters have in common is that visitors already know exactly what they're in for based on the smell.
I actually only needed the volumetric farts of about 15 hamsters.
However, I thought it's not realistic to have them all fart at the same time, so I kept buying more.
Eventually it was a big enough group that it seemed more statistically plausible that 15 of them farted in unison.
I feed them beer and cheese and beans to increase the hypothetical flatulence interval of each hamster.
Also I have found, adding "I don't know, maybe something startled them and some of them... Went off" helps. I could buy a few more hamsters instead, but times are hard.