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what are the next winning lottery numbers?
Gotta be more specific or you'll get monkey-pawed. The next winning lottery number is 42. At the bingo hall of the assisted living facility in Fargo, North Dakota.
If their gonna go monkeys paw on my ass, it's gonna happen no matter how specific I get. you can't outsmart wish-granters, they literally bend fate to their will.
also sorry for nitpicking, but a real monkeys paw would be something like:
"the way you find out the winning lotto numbers is by a lawyer knocking on your door and saying your son died horrifically and he left you this lotto ticket in his will."
the numbers would get you your million dollar jackpot, your wish would be fully granted, you just won't want it anymore because of the price you paid for it. winning $50 from some granny's bingo Hall instead of the thing you actually wished for is hardly a consequence at all, more like a prank a genie would pull just to fuck with you. monkeys paws are more cruel than that.
Winner, winner, hot dog dinner