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House Passes Johnson’s Plan to Avert Shutdown in Bipartisan Vote
(www.nytimes.com)
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this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2023
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Masturbatin' Mike Johnson just got his first legislative win!
I'm so proud of this man who sends his porn history to his underage son.
I hope that nickname sticks lol
It's definitely sticky...
"My girl got sick so I'm stuck here on Friday night pulling a Johnson"
Copied a previous comment of mine. There's some ugly context to this:
Former fundie here. Y'all are probably misinterpreting what is going on.
Mike Johnson is a True Believer™ from what I've seen. Doesn't mean he's not a terrible person, but his motives and actions aren't necessarily as simple as repressed urges to view gay porn.
The most likely explanation is that Mike Johnson's son was watching porn and got caught, probably more than once. He probably admitted his guilt early on, but he attempted to hide the activity. So, not only do you have the kid for sexual immorality but you've got him for dishonesty. After hours of lectures at the boy - involving his mother, father, possibly clergy or youth leadership - the poor kid is probably swearing on a stack of bibles that he sees the light and will never do it again. That's not good enough. He can't be trusted as this isn't the first time.
This passage was probably pounded in bone deep:
Matthew 5:
27Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: 28But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. 29And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. 30And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
So, the boy should rip out his own eyes and cut off the hand he jacks off with. Maybe he should castrate himself. If the behavior continues, he's willfully hellbound. Doesn't he understand?
So, Mike Johnson, wonderful paragon of fatherly leadership, says they will both install this software. That way he can prove what a good person he is and bear the cross of his son's sin. See how great he is? He's helping the boy with his problem. Barf.
So, now the kid's 'sin' is making national news and impacting his father who is a Great Man™.
Christian guilt in a nutshell.
I really feel for the poor bastard. Hopefully he makes it out from under the shadow of his father's insanity. It's truly evil shit.
I also grew up a fundie evangelical and am out of it now (and coincidentally ‘out’ now at nearly 40).
This is bang on. Hearing this story didn’t really phase me because it’s a clear misinterpretation of what they do.
They have an accountability software like xwatch or covenant eyes that tracks everything they do online (limited to machines it’s installed on so any adult could just go buy a new device) and reports any shady URLs to their ‘accountability partner’. Mike is playing that role for his son which, in fundie land, is great parental support. And for reasons unknown to me, his son seems to play that role for him, which is decidedly less common as it elevates a son to an equal position with the father. But this shit happens sometimes, especially in a particularly insular family where it would be damaging for the truth of these behaviors to come out. A good example is how the Duggars handled Josh being a sexual predator before it went public.
What's that nickname from?
He gave an interview where he talked about him and his son monitoring each other's porn consumption
deleted by creator
Oh god, I didn't even think about the kid having to go to school with this being in the news.
It was honestly much less explicit than that. They were each able to see the other's search history, which his rationale was to make sure neither were watching porn. At no point in the interview was there any indication either watched porn (on a device with this monitoring program). The dude is a zealot nutjob, but on this one it really isn't as bad as the headlines that were written
The app is Covenant Eyes. https://slate.com/human-interest/2023/11/mike-johnson-republican-speaker-interview-covenant-eyes.html
It gives you a blurred view of the porn the other person is viewing in a near-realtime feed https://www.covenanteyes.com/how-it-works/#activity-feed
It is exactly as bad as it sounds unless they choose to claim to not be using this feature and we choose to believe them.
If he’s a bonafide sincere fundie, then it’s a ruse to show his son how perfect he is while monitoring the son’s internet usage with the illusion of mutual accountability and respect. His son catching him watching porn would shatter the image of infallible masculine absolute authority that fundie parents wield over their families.
Johnson uses covenant eyes to spy on his son. That’s all it is. He watches his porn on a different device, or legit doesn’t watch porn and just meets prostitutes thrice weekly.
He's a fucking scumbag no matter how to try to twist it.