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I haven’t shared this with more than like 5-6 people IRL, but I have OCD. Not self diagnosed (sucks that I have to state that). My obsessions are death/mortality/morbid thoughts in general. It’s awful and I truly would never wish this disorder on anyone.
I've been looking at this comment for a couple of minutes now, and I can't let it go.
I sometimes (at least once a day) am very aware of my mortality, the fact that I'm over half, what's the use etc. No death wish, don't get me wrong. It HAS and IS seriously influencing my day to day life, up to the point I made life decisions based on these feelings.
I had no idea it could be related to ocd...
It’s possible! Another key component is these thoughts will also cause mild to severe anxiety. I would go talk to someone if I were you, medications have helped me immensely in taking back my life from OCD.