Okay, this might sound like a first-world problem, but I suffer from schizophrenia, so please hear me out. I work in an office setting with just two people. The job I currently have is the most laid-back gig I've ever had, as I essentially work in a support role for the other person who works full-time. I work only four days a week and have a flexible, relaxed schedule.
Truth be told, my coworker is also my mentor, and I am being prepared to eventually run the operation on my own. If I worked hard and dedicated myself, I might come close to achieving the greatness of my mentor. Seriously, he is an absolute beast in his field. The thing is, I just don't want to do it. Plus, I'm not even sure I could do it even if I wanted to.
The current state of affairs is perfect, and I love it. I just don't 'want' more. Yet I know it can't last forever like this.
If I followed in the footsteps of my mentor, I could make serious money - like a substantial amount. I doubt I could ever make that money anywhere else through legal means. (I wouldnt be a millionaire dont worry hexbear) However, I'm scared of the time and mental commitment required. I'm a lazy slob, not a super elite salaryman. I just don't know what to do. I feel like I should just get my shit together and be a real MAN™, make that money. I want kids one day and a family; this would secure that dream. On the other hand, I'm kinda chill being alone, and having kids could remain a dream?
Currently, I work to live. Could I envision a scenario where I live to work, if it meant substantial benefits despite the sacrifice?
Im aware that even being my position is a privilege (regardless of my minority background)
It might all seem childish, I know, but I have been living in a lull. Only in the last 10 months or so have I been waking up; that's why I'm making this post.
Any input is welcome.
A good job is hard to find. Especially now. I think it's not about what you should do, just do what interests you. There's no point in making a move if your heart's not in it. Let your mind go where it will, you'll meet who you do and what will be will be.