this post was submitted on 06 Mar 2024
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Dating apps are often a miserable experience for the participants, however for some reason they are quite popular and at times can be quite addictive.

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[–] oxjox@lemmy.ml 19 points 7 months ago

A couple others here have the problem figured out and are echoing what I've been saying for years. Swiping is the problem. The addictive gamification of it may be fine for hookups (or just people browsing) but not for finding a potential partner.

Displaying more people, keeping you on the app for longer, is how these apps sell advertising. It's about money, not love (especially given that they're almost all owned by the same company now).

The more details you can include about yourself, the more data the platform has to understand you, the more likely it should be able to set you up with a partner. This results in far fewer people to choose from (less ad space), but potentially a higher likelihood of making a match.

Now, this may suggest the solution is a subscription service with some exclusivity and actual effort put into solving a problem for single adults. However, it's clear that when given the options of a high-quality subscription service or an ad-subsidized inferior option, most people choose the cheaper. And the video streaming services have pointed out that they make more money from ads than they do subscriptions.

I have other opinions about how so many people are choosing to not interact with people IRL and how this is impacting our self-confidence and ability to function as a giving and empathetic partner. But maybe that's off topic.