this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2023
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Personal background: I strongly feel just about everyone grows up and has something shitty about them. I know growing up I definitely thought and said some less-than-ideal jokes about women, minorities, etc. And while some of that was the proverbial 'the times', and some was growing up in a sheltered hyper Christian southern American conservative situation, I regret my actions and am happy I grew past that. And I do think people, especially younger, can grow past their shittiness, especially with the help of others, which was true for me too... When I got my first W2 job a superior I looked up to helped mold me into a better person by calling me out on things and modeling a better behavior.

Current situation: I'm now the supervisor position, have been for a decade (retail is a trap) and I've taken that to heart, calling out jokes that aren't funny, etc. But recently we hired a new kid who acts really incel-ish, and who apparently has attached himself to me instantly. I've had moderate success so far just telling him his 'lol women dumb' jokes aren't funny, and modeling how working with women is... normal? Anyways, I don't wanna screw this up so do y'all have any suggestions for me to help keep him from going down an unfortunate path? I know at the end of the day I'm not responsible for others' routes in life, but I feel we should all do our parts.

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[–] the_itsb@beehaw.org 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It sounds like you've never had the experience of being the woman used as a lesson, and I'm really glad for you. I'm sorry you think my lived experience is weird! Blessed be.

[–] mojo@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's awesome, but it's literally a "hey, you should go to talk her"

[–] myfavouritename@beehaw.org 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I feel this comment is brushing off the important point the commentator above is making. I understand that you wanted to clarify or defend your original statement. But if you don't respond appropriately to what the person you're talking to has said, you're not really having a conversation. Instead you're just talking at someone.