this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2024
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askchapo

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I seem to have radicalized a bit too quickly. Does anyone have advice for this particular scenario (hexbear.net)
submitted 9 months ago by Hohsia@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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Oh my. It seems like a shitload of otherwise progressive people have no qualms about the idea of a traditional marriage and the man retaining most of the control by default.

This makes me very uncomfortable because I have met some women who have internalized this idea (idk is it that patriarchy or am I overreacting?) which is just so weird to me.

Like, you’re a left-leaning person up until the point where you’re happy to be in a relationship with a cishet man who controls you now. This is society I guess 🤷‍♂️

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[–] Dolores@hexbear.net 21 points 9 months ago

i mean as you explain it that's patriarchy and everyone has it acculturated in them to some extent, and aren't going to be 100% feminist 100% of the time

but a lot of people have strange relationship dynamics that can map onto cishet standards without that necessarily being a coerced toxic thing. e.g. one partner being the dominant cook because they like it, if the cook is a woman that looks like a cishet thing, but the division of labor & norms beyond that category can be totally different.