this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2024
43 points (100.0% liked)

Off My Chest

833 readers
1 users here now

RULES:


I am looking for mods!


1. The "good" part of our community means we are pro-empathy and anti-harassment. However, we don't intend to make this a "safe space" where everyone has to be a saint. Sh*t happens, and life is messy. That's why we get things off our chests.

2. Bigotry is not allowed. That includes racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and religiophobia. (If you want to vent about religion, that's fine; but religion is not inherently evil.)

3. Frustrated, venting, or angry posts are still welcome.

4. Posts and comments that bait, threaten, or incite harassment are not allowed.

5. If anyone offers mental, medical, or professional advice here, please remember to take it with a grain of salt. Seek out real professionals if needed.

6. Please put NSFW behind NSFW tags.


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

I'm supposed to be on vacation but I've spent it caring for other people and never myself. I know I feel like an asshole just saying that. But it's wearing me down.
I'm a single dad and I can't seem to make enough money to survive, but it seems like everyone depends on me. My mother has cancer and I have to be there for her. My best friend caught his wife cheating and he moved in with me since he would be homeless otherwise. He has a job but it pays maybe $300 a month but he can't seem to get better work because he's disabled. So I'm basically supporting him and his daughter who is here as well. His ex contributes just enough to cover bus fare for his daughter to get to school.
I'm fighting a custody battle after years of abuse and I'm fucking terrified that the judge will eventually give my ex custody because the court in my country never awards custody to the father. Even though she's been documented medically abusing our daughter. She contributes nothing to support our daughter and seldom tries to even see her.
And my boss turned me down when another department asked for me to work there for more pay. His reason was that it was too short notice and that he needs me. That extra money would have helped so much with the above issues but he can't be inconvenienced. I'm looking to leave but the job market here is shit and that opportunity was extremely rare.

top 4 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Crackhappy@lemmy.world 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Wow. I feel for you. That is incredibly difficult and thank you for trying your best. hug

[–] necrobius@lemm.ee 6 points 3 months ago

Thanks, I'm just trying to hang in there until things get better

[–] verstra@programming.dev 9 points 3 months ago

Shit man, this feels like a lot. Kudos for lasting for more than a day in this position. It will get better. Maybe not tomorrow or maybe not before it gets a little worse, but it will get better.

[–] canadaduane@lemmy.ca 5 points 3 months ago

You're not alone in feeling like you bear the weight alone. I mean, with all you're doing, you're basically a church-on-wheels here. And I say that both as a compliment and as a reflection of our situation as a society--we need each other, we need neighbors, community, and we need help sometimes. And many people are feeling the "it's too much to do alone" conclusion. I don't think we were meant to be this way. I've been reading Seth Kaplan's "Fragile Neighborhoods" recently and I feel like my eyes are open to the deep loss in social capital or "collective efficacy" that previous generations had. We're in a period of innovating on new social structures. It's tough. Keep going. Play the long game, make friends and neighbors, and don't forget you're just human too. We need each other.