Good thing I tried pegging for the first time tonight then! Ticked that one off the bucket list just in time!
this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2024
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Congrats on the pegging, happy for you.
Oh please yes!
Time to paint a new sign, methinks.
so nobody can know the date of the rapture, and if someone figures it out god'll change it?
what if I make a website that just says "the rapture will be [current date +1]"
checkmate?
So I was justified when I left those dishes in the sink. Thank goodness. Thank you, Jesus.
The lord works in mysterious ways!
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Jesus better fucking come I've been jerking him off for like 20 minutes
Jesus, King of the Edging!
Still the 18th here. Anyone know where I can buy some inflatable sex dolls and helium at this hour?
Why helium?
To inflate the sex dolls.. He prefers doing chicks when they're high.
Maybe so the sex doll will go to heaven too
Oh I get it. He knows because he's a depraved perv he isn't getting raptured so he's gonna fill it with helium, hold on as it rises, then enter heaven with a sex doll and fuck it silly in front of St Peter while cumming with a high pitched moan.
Good plan, actually.
~~9-18-24~~ ~~9-19-24~~ ~~9-20-24~~ ~~9-21-24~~ 9-22-24
I mean...if they keep this up they will be right eventually...right?
Like my wife, every day for 17 years, "That tree is going to fall down."
Tree falls down.
"I told you so."
LMFAO
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Amateurs. Never put a date on your rapture predictions. Just say it is happening soon.
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It's almost 9pm where I am and there's no sign of it. Jesus better hurry his ass up if he wants to be on time.
Maybe everyone around you is a filthy sinner.
Maybe that's been the joke for centuries. The rapture happened but nobody made the cut. Seems consistent with the Bible.
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But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.
Matthew 24:36.
RTFM, noob.
RTFB
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Oh, shit! Who will water my plants?!
It's your lucky day - I happen to run a post-rapture plant watering and pet sitting business - I'm sure as shit not getting raptured.
I'm guessing you haven't had many customers yet?
Also, you think you're not getting raptured but you are literally offering a good thing for people that won't even pay you. Pretty sure Jesus would think you were dope.
I'm only a new startup, so I'm looking to take on my first clients.
I figure things will work out - people that believe in the rapture tend not to pay attention to all the "love thy neighbour", golden rule, feed the hungry, bathe the lepers Jesus teachings...
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Is this EST, PDT, Australish? Need to plan my pooping.
It's probably a coded message. Read it in the order of colors.
Jesus is rapture - 9-18-24 will on coming the happen.
It all makes sense!
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Can we go ahead and get the rapture over with so the rest of us can get some peace and god damn quiet?
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They may have screwed up their ISO date format. They really mean it'll happen on the 9th day of the 18th month of 2024.
It tracks
Never mind the old flippediroo of the day and month. What I want to know is why is there a dash in front of the date. I thought the separators went between the things to be separated.