Yikes, I got a tough one.
“Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him.”
— Mark 16:6
this post was submitted on 07 Mar 2025
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A vacation to Jerusalem?
I was actually asked to leave my parents church because I was loudly arguing with the guy running a gift shop that if I were to follow Jesus, I should be flipping these tables, chasing them with whips, and damming them for turning gods house into a place of business occupied by thieves.
I guess they DON'T like considering what Jesus would do.
Gift shop... In a church... The Bars so low it's cracking the pavement.
I live in Australia and this has been a thing in every pentecostal church I've been to.
This happens at churches of enough historical significance they become regular tourist attractions.
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Wasn't Jesus just some snotty god's bastard that god doesn't even move a finger to save from death? I suppose his opinions are irrelevant. God is the boss. And god loves money.
Well, if your catholic. Jesus IS God. Just to make a stupid story even more stupid.
A lot of protestants are into the trinity thing too.
I was not aware!
They’d just take this as evidence of institutionalized persecution against Christians
Oh come on. Most of the bible is boring stuff.
Isn't the old testament more hardcore than the new one ? Jewish roulette would seem more risky than christian roulette
I mean, obviously Jesus would get arrested by modern "christians" for being a "leftist hippie commie"
Seeing as they claim Jesus amd Yahweh are one in the same you can't just ignore the OT. All the condoning slavery, taking child sacrifice as payment, stoning women who don't bleed on their wedding night.... that is all part of the Christian god.
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It's so weird how the last few years, Christians act like the OT has nothing to do with them.
It's not just the last couple years. Things have been taught that way by the Catholic Church for decades.
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Oh I don't doubt they exist. Just haven't seen before.
Let's industrialize this particular potential blasphemy.
https://dailyverses.net/random-bible-verse
Ed: > Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them.
Mark 11:23
Hey at least I'm not going to prison.
This one claims to be truly random, I suspect yours is rigged to be more positive.
https://searchthebible.com/truly_random_bible_verse.php
Example:
3: And hath gone and served other gods, and worshipped them, either the sun, or moon, or any of the host of heaven, which I have not commanded; 4: And it be told thee, and thou hast heard of it, and inquired diligently, and, behold, it be true, and the thing certain, that such abomination is wrought in Israel:
5: Then shalt thou bring forth that man or that woman, which have committed that wicked thing, unto thy gates, even that man or that woman, and shalt stone them with stones, till they die.
6: At the mouth of two witnesses, or three witnesses, shall he that is worthy of death be put to death; but at the mouth of one witness he shall not be put to death.
7: The hands of the witnesses shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterward the hands of all the people. So thou shalt put the evil away from among you.
Prison it is.
The first ten verses I pulled were innocuous. "God is pretty cool, actually" -type stuff.
It would not surprise me if it's rigged to be upbeat.
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Again with the begatting!
that's a lot of sex
gawd damn son....
I got Law-ception
"All who sin apart from the law will also perish apart from the law, and all who sin under the law will be judged by the law."
Just... go to jail.. or don't... I don't know..
This is the kind of shit that people who have never read a fucking book before see and think, "whoa, that's so deep."
"Not the goats again!"
I used https://randombible.org/ but it seems like the bible is just a series of random stories that make no sense.
How wild would it be if you actually met an all-powerful entity who created the entire universe. You ask it for some knowledge, and it tells you about the time it got mad at a tree for not producing figs
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Mark+11%3A12-25&version=NIV
IT WASN'T EVEN FIG SEASON, JESUS!
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I’m working on my salting with fire technique but not much progress yet.
I think I can own a Canadian legally now, though. Get a pardon for trying, anyway.
opens bible. Points at random verse. Ezekiel 23:20.
😨
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