this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2023
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Programmer Humor

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[–] DonjonMaister@programming.dev 18 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Stage 4.5: console.log() everything.

[–] zqwzzle@lemmy.ca 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And then the logging fixes the subtle timing issue causing the problem.

[–] V699@kbin.social 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Race conditions are the worst

[–] zqwzzle@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 year ago

Good ol’ Heisenbugs.

[–] danc4498@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

We have logging software built in, but I can never remember how to turn it on, so I just console.log

[–] 0x4E4F@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Step 4.6: Get another drive for the logs.

[–] gerdesj@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

4.7: Write app specific log parser 4.8: Fix log parser goto 0.99999999999999923415

[–] Dirk@lemmy.ml 10 points 1 year ago

console.log("Does it happen here?")

[–] axtualdave@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Everyone always skips the last step, but that's where you learn.

[–] fubo@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

"I notice that I am confused, and thus that one of my beliefs is fiction."

[–] dan1101@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

How did that ever work, I've been there many times.

[–] Rhaedas@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I have some Excel VBA scripting that I've been on 1-4 for a while now, so there's a branch off of 4 that should be "fuck it, here's the workaround" or "that part isn't that important anyway, ignore it".

(it's actually not Excel that's the problem, it's the change to its call to IE that throws up a stupid security warning.)

[–] chaorace@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 1 year ago

Oh my god this comment gave me an aneurysm

[–] macgregor@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Get enough experience and you just have a brief moment of stage 3 as you dive straight to stage 4.

Unless it's a customer/that-one-guy-at-work (it's a title, but there's usually a handful of them) and then there's this vast stage 0 of back and forth of "are you sure that's happening, run these commands and paste the entire output to me" to be sure of what they are saying then you jump to stage 3/4.

[–] V699@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

I jump straight to step 6

[–] z500@startrek.website 5 points 1 year ago

Every time that last part happens I have to check the proper spelling of Berenstain. I've had some that really seem like they should have been impossible lol

[–] DarthYodaX@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 1 year ago

My boss does 1 <--> 2 with us over most every bug any of us has ever found. Ticking time-bomb...

[–] ShustOne@lemmy.one 4 points 1 year ago

As true as true can ever be

[–] kriss0706@kbin.social 4 points 1 year ago

its funny i see this now, after spending 3 hours debugging D:

[–] PtitSerpent@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

if (0 === 0) {
var_dump($test); die;
}

[–] perviouslyiner@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

if ((x != x) || (x == x+1)) then it's one of those weird numbers

[–] tgxn@lemmy.tgxn.net 2 points 1 year ago

Ahhhhh, PHP.... 😭

[–] randombit@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

One of the best pieces of advice I have ever gotten was to build diagnostics first. The time it takes to do will pay for itself 100X over the course of development.

[–] Celivalg@iusearchlinux.fyi 2 points 1 year ago

100% unit tests ftw

Hate making them, love them when they are here

[–] egeres@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Stage 7: Who wrote this?

Stage 8: Ah ok... it was me

[–] SillyJester@lemmygrad.ml 1 points 1 year ago

6 stages of dev grief when I find a bug which doesn't make sense and report it to the devs. Lol.

[–] ZcaT@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Has it ever!?