This is why therapy exists.
this post was submitted on 19 Nov 2023
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For rich people or born lucky health plan countries?
Always love this. "Go to therapy!" Gonna pay for it? "...no"
Well back to suppressing my emotions again. There is no emotion, there is only peace...
Watch out, Jedi code didn't work too well for Anakin
Same when Republicans say "it's not guns, it's mental health." Okay, you going to support universal mental healthcare then? "Shut up, commie."
And the most important: there are four lights.
maybe apply for asylum in a better country I guess
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Yeah, pretty much. It's just better not to put that emotional weight on people, if you can.
There's a lot more therapy services coming out, though! I wouldn't argue it's easily accessible, but it's getting there.
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It's sad how many men don't have friends outside of family and dates.
If that's you, please get friends. If you don't know how, find a hobby where you're likely to interact with other people, and interact with them. Even if it's just smalltalk, that's a start.
Yeah lemme go to the friend store and pick up a couple lol
Oh damn, fresh outta 35-45 age bracket, as they all have kids and full time jobs that don't match with my days off. Bummer.
Why do they have to be in the same age range? I'm a college student, and the most recent major friend I've made is a retired senior citizen.
Friends don't have to be in the same age range, but generally you have more in common with people your own age because you've all had similar experiences in terms of going through the same history and pop culture. I'm in my mid-40s. If I'm in an antique store or flea market with a 20-year-old and I point out an Atari 2600 Missile Command cartridge, they likely won't know what it is. If I show it to people my age, it brings up memories and suddenly we can talk about how we used to play our Ataris.
"Hey man, we were thinking of going camping later, but first playing some Mariokart and doing shots. You coming?"
"...oh sure, you can count me in!"
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People always say this, and then suggest trash like Pickleball and board games. I already have hobbies, they just happen at home.
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K so what if you have a crazy busy job and no free time because family. What then. Working hard to keep the family afloat has to be number one - then it’s sleep and victuals and stuff.
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Also: You can do the hobbies online if you do not want to keep it IRL. My longest standing friend I met over at an online forum like 13 or so years ago. I also met a few people I still hang with every now and then via minecraft servers.
It's difficult to get friends when you're a dude. There's the never ending suspicion you get from your wife.
Sure, it's crazy behavior, but as a man, you can't really argue it, since society is generally on the side of women being suspicious (and dare I say it, insecure). Eventually it gets cleared up when she checks your phone, calls your friends, follows along during your guy nights, etc.
But the fact that it happens at all is just exhausting and generally guys don't wanna deal with that.
The fact that it happens at all, is some rom-com higschooler mentality that I refuse to put up with. There have been a fuckton of women that tried that bullshit with me. If you're going to play highschool games, you don't deserve a man. You deserve a little boy, as you're clearly a little girl/boy/other sexuality, but you still are in highschool and don't have the ability to fulfill an actual adult in your relationship. I've had far too many try to date me.
If you want a relationship that is based in reality, I'm down. I've yet to meet a woman that actually wants a relationship based in reality. Kinda sucks for me since I don't like guys. Especially since I've been hit on by multiple guys that would have been great for me, if they'd been women.
There's the never ending suspicion you get from your wife.
That's not normal and healthy. I don't have that issue with my wife, and I'm not aware of any friends that do either. I mean if my friends and I had a habit of going to strip clubs or something... yeah, that's going to make the misses insecure. But if you don't have a history of behavior that has earned her suspicion, I'd be looking at couple's therapy to get past that.
I have been in a relationship with someone like that. It was miserable not being trusted and having arguments about her baseless suspicions. In my case I eventually realized she was projecting.
You really do want to gather a good group of friends in your youth, it gets more difficult in adulthood
I'm part of three different groups since late teens, but since working full time I have only made maybe 3 new friends (not counting comings and goings from the groups)
It's nice being in a beer brewing friend group, the beer just gets better and better as budgets improve
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But making friends means going out. Then there's even more going out to interact with said friends. Screw that.
I don't think I will... Who needs friends when you have vim?
I have plenty of friends, I just don't like any of them.
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I have friends, I just don't like talking about myself to other people.
So you don’t have close friends
That's common enough, many people have no need or desire to open up to others, a few of my favourite people are like that, though I'm not
Most of my friends are people I know IRL. But we only get time to interact online. So we play video games for an hour or so. In that hour or two we don't really talk about our lives. We don't talk about the shitty things or the good things. We just play the game and have fun.
So far, it has worked for me.
That was how things were for me too. In the end we never talked about anything going on in our lives. We grew more and more distant as we grew older and found we knew less and less about each other. It doesn't last forever. Share your lives and the games. Otherwise in the end you will just have the games.
I think this is pretty common for us. Having fun >> Talking about life and problems
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