this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2025
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Bikini Bottom Twitter

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Ahoy, me buckos! Welcome to Bikini Bottom Twitter! Your digital reef for the latest salty gossip and treasure tales! And while you're at it, be sure to drop by the Krusty Krab for a delicious Krabby Patty so I can get yer mon- err I mean, 'cause they're the best treat under the sea!

Rule 1 - This is Bikini Bottom Twitter, all posts should be Spongebob related in "(Old-School) Twitter-like" form

Rule 2 - Political posts, as long as it follows rule 1, will be permitted, so long as you behave yourselves.

Bikini Bottom Municipal Code §33-07: Anti-Tankie Ordinance Residents are prohibited from circulating tankie ideology or other authoritarian propaganda on Bikini Bottom Twitter. Offenders will be permanently banned from BPT by the BBPD faster than Plankton is ejected from The Krusty Krab.

Rule 3 - Please no reposts within the last couple days, at least

Rule 4 - All posts should be at least above a "Squirdward-krusty-krab-shift" level of effort

Rule 5 - Be chill, be a Patrick not a squidward.

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[–] Etterra@discuss.online 10 points 1 month ago

Nobody likes a narc.

[–] SkyNTP@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 month ago
[–] BootyEnthusiast@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)

That kid taking a FAT SHIT or what?

[–] SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This happened to me when I was 9. Kid was indeed still taking a fat shit. AMA

What was it like taking a fat shit?

[–] ClockworkOtter@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

I don't know.

Why do 12 year old boys take long showers?

[–] Psythik@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Is 19 minutes supposed to be a long time to take a shit?

It takes me 20 to 45 minutes on average. I tried adding more fiber to my diet. Nothing changed so I just assumed this was normal.

[–] ook@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Are you on your phone while shitting?

[–] Psythik@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Of course. Can't poop without it. I have ADHD, so the brain needs to be stimulated constantly during every waking hour.

And before we had cell phones with internet connections, it was books. I've had toilet reading material for as long as I can remember.

[–] njm1314@lemmy.world 0 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Ah so you were 12-year-old nark then huh?