137
submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by JustAManOnAToilet@lemmy.world to c/news@lemmy.world
all 36 comments
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[-] Veedem@lemmy.world 25 points 10 months ago

Remember when we all thought how cute it was that that one otter was stealing surf boards? They’re done being cute, now.

[-] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago

different otters. entirely different species.

[-] PetDinosaurs@lemmy.world 15 points 10 months ago

Bruh. Don't fall for the propaganda.

This is just the beginning. I'm getting out while I still can.

[-] jayrhacker@kbin.social 6 points 10 months ago

I for one welcome our new floating fuzzy overlords…

[-] Earthwormjim91@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

Otters are only cute to people that don’t know anything about otters.

They’re massive rapists.

[-] MaxMouseOCX@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

If you look at the animal kingdom, you'll see that rape is kind of the norm.

[-] echodot@feddit.uk 1 points 10 months ago

And yet, not a particularly great legal defence.

[-] NoIWontPickaName@kbin.social 1 points 10 months ago

Yeah, but they hold hands when they sleep and break clams on their tummies!!!

[-] TheLobotomist@lemmy.world 15 points 10 months ago

Just bite back, your teeth are bigger and your jaws are stronger! You are an animal, act like one!

[-] Hank@kbin.social 8 points 10 months ago

Beat it into a pulp. Then have sex with its corpse. Not for pleasure but to send a message to its kind.

[-] MagicShel@programming.dev 6 points 10 months ago

I don't have any messages I need to send that badly.

[-] Earthwormjim91@lemmy.world 6 points 10 months ago

That’s what otters do. If you want to send a message you have to speak their language.

Really though, otters are some of the most viscous little critters. They will rape other animals to death. Then rape their corpses.

Otters are fucked up.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

And yet so cute.

[-] Hanabie@sh.itjust.works 5 points 10 months ago

Also, your saliva is more infectious.

[-] FireTower@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

Mustalids routinely win against larger prey. Stout kill full size rabbits and a wolverine has been recorded to have killed a polar bear. Don't give the otter an excuse.

[-] Torvum@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago

Otters are apex predators simply because they have the ability of tactical genius working in strike group squads. If you've ever seen the videos of them taking down and drowning crocodiles, then you know. They are not omg adorbs so cute!! They can and will destroy you. Walking navy seal copypastas.

[-] Blademax@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

Zootopia taught me that (Emmett) Otter(ton) is apex predator that can go...Savage.

[-] chalupapocalypse@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago

God damn I didn't know otters were 1.2 meters long, that's a big fuckin' marmot dude

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

Giant otters in the Amazon can get to be 2 meters long.

[-] MaxMouseOCX@lemmy.world 4 points 10 months ago

There's a video on YouTube where otters were housed with monkeys, the monkeys trolled the shit out of the otters for the Lulz... Eventually the otters all sort of snapped, together, grabbed one and absolutely mauled the shit out of it.

[-] Mostly_Gristle@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago

Of all the things to get attacked by in Montana. Not a bear, not a mountain lion, or a wolf, or a moose. Nope, a fucking otter is the thing that gets you. Jesus.

[-] Supervisor194@lemmy.world 9 points 10 months ago

By the grace of god you made it out of the river? By the grace of god? You dumb shitheel an otter bit your fuckin' ear off. If anything your stupid ass got smote.

[-] HomebrewHedonist@lemmy.ca 9 points 10 months ago

That otter make her think twice.

[-] NoIWontPickaName@kbin.social 8 points 10 months ago

Alright, Florida Man, you're up.

Call, Raise, or Fold?

[-] jasonwaterfalls@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

Otters are mean

[-] SnowdenHeroOfOurTime@unilem.org 6 points 10 months ago
[-] Especially_the_lies@startrek.website 4 points 10 months ago

Someone go tell Asst. Mayor Bellweather that she was right! The otters have gone savage!

[-] HurlingDurling@lemm.ee 4 points 10 months ago

"... And in otter news!"

[-] Thekingoflorda@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

Could you please edit the post to have the NSFW tag checked. Thank you (:

[-] athos77@kbin.social 3 points 10 months ago

It ... it bit part of her ear off!!

[-] HotsauceHurricane@lemmy.one 3 points 10 months ago

Now we all know that otters fuck and specifically with YOU.

[-] nl4real@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

That Otter leave a mark!

[-] Lemmylaugh@lemmy.ml 2 points 10 months ago

That otter leave a mark!

this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2023
137 points (94.2% liked)

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