this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2024
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[–] Nemo@midwest.social 37 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

If it had four doors it'd be a chicken sedan.

[–] Lifecoach5000@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago

Why don’t Chryslers have horns?

Because they say DODGE on the front.

[–] iamericandre@lemmy.world 23 points 8 months ago

I took the kids to Disney land, and when we got close the sign said Disney Land left so we turned around and went home

[–] cooltrainer_frank@lemmy.world 17 points 8 months ago

Did you hear what happened to the cyber criminal?

She ransomware

[–] OurTragicUniverse@kbin.social 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.

Badum dum tish

[–] mb_@lemm.ee 3 points 8 months ago

🐑🥁🐍

[–] Aurix@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

There is a community for that here.

[–] frankenswine@lemmy.world 20 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] Stiny@sh.itjust.works 20 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] Coki91@dormi.zone 15 points 8 months ago

Boooo, they said "I" not "I'm"

[–] CosmicApe@kbin.social 10 points 8 months ago

When driving past a cemetery: Did you know people who live in this town aren't allowed to be burried there?
Why?
Because they're still alive! They're dying to get in though!

[–] Moobythegoldensock@lemm.ee 9 points 8 months ago

I like to tell dad jokes.

Sometimes, he laughs.

[–] ace_garp@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago

Did you hear about the guy who fell in the well?

He did not see that well.

[–] TheRealKuni@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

A: Didn’t have the guts.

Also

Q: What do you call a paper airplane that can’t fly?

A: Stationery.

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 5 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I spilled Spot remover on my dog and now he's gone 🥺

[–] Nomecks@lemmy.ca 4 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Geese fly in a vee to save energy. Do you know why one side of the vee is longer than the other?

There's more geese on one side.

[–] NoSpiritAnimal@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago

My wife didn't believe me when I said I built a car out of spaghetti and meatballs.

She was blown away when I drove pasta.

[–] lvxferre@mander.xyz 3 points 8 months ago

Sorry for not contributing with the thread, I don't know any of those jokes that works well in English. I'm here to remember Portuguese speakers that there's /c/tiodopave@lemmy.eco.br to post this sort of joke.