When you are doing something for the second+ time, it is quite normal to not have as much euphoria as the first time. When I first bought femme clothes and put them on I felt super euphoric but the second and third time not so much, because it ends up just becoming a normal thing.
Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
In my experience, the euphoria I felt at the beginning was huge. From small things like making a femme character in a game and dressing her up in little outfits. Shaving and having a smooth face would do it, too. Big smiles and glee.
Over time, the feeling of being constantly awash in dysphoria lessened, and those feelings are a bit more "normal", in a way. Like ... Making a femme character now is the default. It's who I am and almost always what I will spring for.
Also, I got laser hair removal and my face is much smoother by default now, and I only have to shave every few days to cut off the white hairs.
Those feelings of joy are still there, but they're so common it takes something huge to make me feel the same "level" of euphoria I did in the past.
But dysphoria hits harder imo since it's much more rare.
HRT helped me a lot with this, less because of the physical effects, and more the mental. I had a lot of depression start lifting when I started HRT and it helped me feel things more strongly. The euphoria hit harder, as the dysphoria faded.
Huge disclaimer here, tho. "your mileage may very" is VERY real. No one account from any other girl's HRT journey was just like mine.
The hard part will be figuring out what makes YOU feel the best and push towards that. This is your journey, and if that journey needs you to just reduce your dysphoria a bit before you can find your joy, then take pleasure in that feeling of being you.
Always remember also that gender isn't binary. Testing out new looks can be helpful. Maybe your euphoria can be found in more gender non conforming looks, or nonbinary aesthetics. Maybe not idk.
The good news is that it's up to you. Good luck, cat! <3
so real, yeah its definetly diminished over time and needs something huge, but idk what
That's the hard part. Find out what makes you happy and pursue that. Try different stuff and experiment.
You might find these podcast videos helpful:
Euphoria / dysphoria are a result from satisfaction / dissatisfaction out of something new you're trying out gender related. Eventually you will feel less of those, and that's ok. At the end of it all what matters is you feel comfortable about yourself. That you feel, you.
For me personally, it has varied a lot over time. I've been on HRT for three years. Last year, I reached a "stalled" point in my transition, where it felt like I wasn't making any progress. But my goodness, six months later my boobs are bigger and rounder, I seem to be getting actual curves, and I have so many tasks I'm working on: voice therapy, surgery consultations, began learning makeup, electrolysis, just bought a bunch of outfits I like, and I'm going out in public as my true self - a woman!
I'm feeling euphoria every day now, whereas a year ago it was rare. I recommend not chasing euphoria, but enjoy it when it comes, and otherwise try to live in a comfortable and authentic way for yourself. Build as much of a support network as possible, because it's hard to do this alone. From my partner to my doctors, therapists, friends and allies along the way, they have all helped me find the courage to do this, to fight the dysphoria and discover the euphoria :)
It's gonna vary from person to person. Dysphoria and euphoria are not the same across the whole trans population, there's people on all ends of the dysphoric and euphoric spectrums. Like some people feel little euphoria to their gender and just want to feel less dysphoric. Some people feel next to no dysphoria but feel a lot of euphoria when their gender is validated. Some people are apathetic towards gender entirely and don't experience dysphoria or euphoria. That being said euphoria for a lot of us is a mark of satisfaction with our gender and gender presentation.
That being said, I feel euphoria every day. When I see myself in the mirror, when I put on a nice outfit that suits me nicely. When I file my nails and paint them, when I shave my legs, when I do my skincare or haircare. Really, any time I feel well connected to my own femininity. When I feel girly or am doing girly parts of my day to day life.
I'm also coming up on 9 years hrt and a year post op, though. I never used to find euphoria came to me this easily. I definitely understand what you mean by just feeling less dysphoric. I think if you're interested in pursuing HRT, then it may help some. It definitely did for me.