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[-] Etterra@lemmy.world 49 points 3 months ago

No, you sell them to gullible idiots for $29.99 + s&h.

[-] jordanlund@lemmy.world 29 points 3 months ago

Make the mouth flap like a billy bass and I'd totally buy one...

[-] desmosthenes@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

second this

[-] HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Here’s the audio track for it lol (trump speeches made into emo song)

https://youtu.be/l61nO1LQ3Hg

[-] HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world 1 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

You can grift those fools out of a lot more than 29.99

[-] Zier@fedia.io 37 points 3 months ago

That cross will never hold all that weight. This will fail, just like the guy hanging from the cross. And fail bigly.

[-] livus@kbin.social 18 points 3 months ago

Popular wisdom is that you need to crucify through the wrists, not the arms, to avoid tearing due to body weight.

In this case I'm thinking you would really need to move it to the shoulders.

[-] lol_idk@lemmy.ml 11 points 3 months ago
[-] Pan_Ziemniak@midwest.social 10 points 3 months ago

Best do both, just to be safe.

[-] livus@kbin.social 13 points 3 months ago

Maybe swap nails out for 12" landscaping bolts.

[-] Pan_Ziemniak@midwest.social 6 points 3 months ago

Nah, i think regular nails should work fine if we perform some sort of improvised weight loss surgery.

[-] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago

I think it'd be fine to just, put some fender washers on the nail. it's not that the nail can't hold... it's more that it'll pull through. But big, wide fender washers should solve that.

[-] livus@kbin.social 7 points 3 months ago

Good point. This is the way to go.

[-] Pan_Ziemniak@midwest.social 3 points 3 months ago

Mmm, good point. This is wonderful bc all in casee all thats lying around are big ol rusty ass nails. I think with the washers theyll do just fine. 👍

[-] CatZoomies@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

I hear you can get those at the Four Seasons Total Landscaping.

Great landscaping company, incredible. Best there’s ever been. Nobody knows more about landscaping than them.

[-] prole@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 months ago

Twelve Inch (Landscaping) Bolts

My favorite band.

[-] sir_pronoun@lemmy.world 25 points 3 months ago

Ugh, take my disgusted upvote

[-] jordanlund@lemmy.world 22 points 3 months ago

I'd put the hat on top of the cross so it's "MAGA" instead of "INRI".

For those who don't get that reference:

Iesus Nazarenus, Rex Iudaeorum
"Jesus the Nazarene, King of the Jews"

Or, for those of us more sacreligious...

"Iron Nails Ran In"

[-] eran_morad@lemmy.world 19 points 3 months ago

Fake news trump’s tits are bigger than that.

[-] Jakdracula@lemmy.world 17 points 3 months ago

Hands are too big.

[-] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago

So….. since Trump likes appropriating things… think he’d mind an actual crucifion?

I’m sure he’ll be back by Sunday…

[-] midori@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago
[-] GladiusB@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago
[-] midori@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I AM RIGHTEOUSNESS. AND RIGHTEOUSNESS WILL PREVAIL.

For real though, that's Vauthry.

[-] GladiusB@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

He's going to turn into a sexy demi god I get to beat the crap out of?

[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 12 points 3 months ago

post the stl when you do

[-] littlebluespark@lemmy.world 12 points 3 months ago

Can you share the file so I can put them up around town, please? 🤣🤘🏽🔥

[-] Drivebyhaiku@lemmy.world 11 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Tempting to give the real life full sized version a try. If the Evengelicals are correct he'll just bounce right back from it. They seem pretty sure yeh know? It would be almost a shame to not test their hypothesis.

this post was submitted on 29 Mar 2024
388 points (97.3% liked)

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