overview for Paradachshund

The Rising Cost of Gaming and Why Tariffs Are Just the Beginning in c/pcgaming@lemmy.ca

[–] Paradachshund 2 points 1 month ago

Buy indie instead 😄

For those that have crossed the US / Canadian border recently: What was your experience like when dealing with US customs? in c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

[–] Paradachshund 3 points 1 month ago

I don't have a personal account but I live in near a tourist destination not far from the border and there were still plenty of BC license plates around this year (though a big drop compared to last year, and I don't blame them). In other words a lot of people are still making it through apparently.

Am I expecting too much from my friends, or is this just a natural drift? in c/casualconversation@lemm.ee

[–] Paradachshund 3 points 1 month ago

I think with a task like that it's hard to judge the response. Many people feel like they're being a burden asking for helpers with things like that, so they may have felt like they were doing you a favor by letting you off the hook when you asked.

To be honest if I were you I would start inviting these people to fun stuff and see what happens. If you try that a few times and you just get dismissive or wishy-washy responses then you probably have your answer and can focus your attention elsewhere.

If you're not hanging out with them already you don't have anything to lose by trying to push the issue a bit. If they really want to hang out they'll be receptive, even if you have to do some negotiating on a time that works for everyone.

Am I expecting too much from my friends, or is this just a natural drift? in c/casualconversation@lemm.ee

[–] Paradachshund 21 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I can definitely say that my friend circle shrunk a lot as I got into my 30s. I also stopped drinking in my late 20s and while I kept a bunch of friends, there were also some I used to have that were so drinking focused in everything they did that we drifted apart naturally after that.

As we get older we get busier. I wouldn't assume it's personal. It takes effort to stay in touch in adulthood and both people have to make an effort and want to. I don't want to assume what you're doing, but that part about the house does make me wonder if you're falling for a classic pattern of expecting others to reach out even though you yourself don't? I've been guilty of this too sometimes, but I think it's good to remember that that kind of expectation can actually make what you're afraid of a reality. The other people might wonder if you still want to hang out since you never initiate.