Giving me a hand job. So even if I lose, I've still won. 100 times.

So now I know what my wife is referring to when she says I'm as majestic as an eagle. She just means what I look like when I first wake up.

Not if he said, "No one will ever believe you."

Glad you aren't drinking beer. You could get sand in your Schlitz. 😁

For those unaware, Schlitz is a brand of beer in the US. 😉

Nope, not legal.

Believe it or not, straight to jail.

Or, that's a paddlin'.

Both applicable. Take your pick.

I'm not your buddy, pal!

It's poop. He eats his poop, doesn't he...?

Poor you!! 😆

Not Tilly. She's a little jerk when she wants to be. Won't leave her big sis alone. 😆

Emma

and Tilly!

It's because you said the "R" word. ;-)

I had no idea what had happened. I just felt a burning sensation on my neck. I thought at first I had just been cut by the corn stalk, but then the pain started spreading. I turned over the leaf and saw that, and freaked out.

The pain lasted for about 30 minutes. About an hour later, when I was able to look in the mirror, there was still a catapillar shaped welt.