regularassbitch

no

they really hired a team of writers to become Brandon while he gets over "long covid". what the fuck

what if he's already dead and they prop him up and use AI to make his face move on video like a grotesque present-day Weekend at Bernie's? i would vote for that

god is so good... this is what it's all about folks. they even got will sasso to come back! sheldonites and big bangers are feasting

I figured it would be nice to get a thread up for questions and comments that people may think don't deserve their own thread.

• What are you reading?
• What did you recently read that was good?
• What did you recently read that was bad?
• Do you have recommendations?

I just got done with Walking Dead (I know) and I couldn't help but enjoy the preview of Murder Falcon in the back of an issue. It's a story about a guy who gets the power to summon a giant muscly falcon with the power of playing metal. It's surprisingly heartfelt and bittersweet and it only runs for 8 issues so you can knock it out in a day if you really want to.

I also really like the new Ultimate Spider-Man stuff they're doing. It's nice to see Peter happy but I can't shake the feeling that they're gonna ruin his life very soon. Honestly I'm happy when Marble does anything that isn't the same thing they've been doing for 30 years. Check out Ultimate X-Men as well if you like capeshit type stuff.

It was a sad day in the subdivision as golf legend Andrew Saltein found himself all dressed up with nowhere to go after the Honkeys last night.

"I just don't get it, we did everything right. We killed at least 300 trees for the new course, there was a country club, ski lodge and everything. The carts play Maroon 5 for God's sake. What more could we do?"

Saltein is talking, of course, about the Snowy Peaks Golf Course and Seasonal Ski Resort. Timmy Timpani, current regional pickleball champion and outspoken critic of the course's construction referred to it as "unsightly," asking "why would they make it both of those things? [They] literally made it all hills just so it becomes white during the winter. The snow machines show exactly how desperate they are".

Others, however, are upset about wider crackerdom's most recent obsession, claiming a need to 'return to tradition'. "It just feels like I've wasted my life chasing the Yakubian dragon at this point," said Brandon Bumblo, amateur golfer and president of his local HOA, "I don't know where to go anymore. People keep telling me to touch grass but that's literally all I've been doing to try to relax. I was so lost in my own thoughts I tried to fine the golf course for not mowing enough and they beat me in the neck and ankles with putters for 45 minutes. I don't even know if that lawsuit is gonna make me feel better."

Tensions are obviously high and are set to get even higher with the recent approval of plans to build the Terry Wilden Indoor Pickleball and Bull Riding Facility. Whatever the solution is, it won't be found in this land of 2% milk and raw honey.

This story is in progress, we will keep you updated as more information becomes available.

Want to write for Fake News? We're holding open applications until December 21st! See link for details

The podcaster has been missing for the past 48 hours after police found the bodies of several beloved cartoon characters while doing a wellness check. No further information has been released, we will keep you updated as the situation develops.

it is incredibly baffling to me. like if i'm sending a picture of my little bone to someone asking for a rating, the last thing i want to do is include money with the request. it taints the sanctity of the rating process by artificially inflating your score. i don't want someone saying i have an 8/10 dick when it's really a 4 or 5. it's insanity