unknownuserunknownlocation

People moving into an expensive apartment on a nightlife strip and complaining about the fucking noise.

I mean I have no problem with people saying what their religion is, but strategically it's probably much better for her not to disclose her religion, since that would open herself to a whole other line of attacks.

I'm not sure it works at all any more without a phone number. I have two Gmail addresses I set up over a decade ago to handle notifications from specific services. I recently got an email telling me to log in or the accounts will be deleted. It then wouldn't let me finish my login without adding a phone number. So I can only assume Gmail without a phone number is a thing of the past now.

Sync is not backup

Thank you. Now can you please explain this to my IT department that thinks force syncing everything on our computers to OneDrive is a solution to our lack of backups?

Note that not all text featuring the following indicators is AI-generated; large language models (LLMs), which power AI-chatbots, have been trained on human writing, and some people may share a similar writing style.

Berlin has even started making announcements about it: "Please mind others and keep your music, tiktoks and phone calls in your ear instead of playing them through your loudspeaker".

The German version holds back a little less: "...music, tiktoks and calls belong in your ear and not played over your speaker".

If you mean what you can do to prevent your own panic attacks - I know of a number of people who have massage rings (aka therapy rings) and massage balls. When they feel a panic attack coming, they will use them by for example squeezing the massage ball pretty hard so it causes a slight amount of pain, and that has a similar effect. As @tomenzgg@midwest.social mentioned, the goal is to shift your attention from the panic attack.

Also, since panic attacks are often coupled with hyperventilation, the breathing into a bag trick isn't some TV trope, it actually works. I had to drive a friend of mine to the hospital for a severe panic attack and they did the bag thing, and I was blown away by how quickly she stopped hyperventilating and calmed down.

Not all that surprised. I've prevented people from having panic attacks by intensely massaging the palm of their hand. They usually wonder WTF I'm doing - but seriously, it works.

"All opinions other than mine are only supported by dopamine highs" - wow, what a great new way of being condescendingly dismissive!

OP actually left the consequences of climate change open. No, it probably won't be a Mad Max inferno. Probably not. But we also don't know where the tipping point of the oceans is, because they are storing a shit ton of carbon. Hit that tipping point, and that carbon may well suddenly be released into the air, and then the shit hits the fan.

But even if that scenario doesn't happen, and the world is still theoretically perfectly livable, you mentioned one of the main problems: mass migration. We already see what that's doing today. We're not far away from World War 3 anymore. So yes, the question is perfectly legitimate.

(And before anyone thinks it: I'm not blaming the migrants, of course they're not at fault, they have every right to look for a better life. The people at fault are entirely different, but it doesn't change the fact there is a causational relationship)

A relationship should never be used as a means to have sex. That will only hurt people. And a relationship is so, so much more than just sex.

Honestly, to me it sounds like you don't really want a (romantic) relationship in the first place. And that's completely fine. Don't try to force something on yourself that you don't want. That will only hurt your partner and disappoint you. It's completely fine to just want friends with benefits or one night stands (or both, as long as you're careful). You do you.

So you're saying it wasn't only abuse from the Clinton supporters, but it was also a result of purity tests. And we keep wondering why the left keeps failing...

freshly single from a longtime toxic ex

This is really the key. Toxic relationships, romantic or otherwise, fuck you up. Badly. Really badly. You know about the tip of the iceberg. Only she knows how deep it goes, and maybe even she doesn't know it (yet).

I won't sit here and say that there are no feelings involved on her side. I don't know that, and there is definitely a possibility that she has a few feelings from what you're describing. But for her right now, she has much bigger fish to fry.

The fact that she got out of that toxic relationship is a seriously large accomplishment for her. It is insanely difficult to get out of those situations. And she will in all likelihood be feeling a whole range of emotions in waves. The one moment she'll want to have a relationship (in general). The next moment, she'll be wanting to explore her newfound freedom. Another moment, she'll just be feeling really down. And quite likely, she will often be fighting with feelings of wanting that toxic relationship back, no matter how bad it was, because that's how toxic relationships are, unfortunately. She needs to sort a hell of a lot of stuff in her head that was messed up during that course (ideally with psychological help).

This will go on for quite a while, likely years. And honestly, it would probably be in her best interest not to get into a relationship at this point. When you're dealing with the repercussions from a situation like that, the last thing you need is something that might stress you more.

As to you? Well, there is the option that you support her getting through it, but this will only work without your goal being a relationship - and you have to be honest with yourself here. Because you will have to distance yourself. Make no mistake, there WILL be pain and suffering. And if you are too close to her emotionally or still have active feelings, it will burn you up from the inside. Shared suffering is half the suffering, but don't underestimate what she brings to the table in that regard. So this would only be an option once your feelings for her have seriously calmed down and you've created enough emotional distance for you to be able to deal with this.

The other option is, of course, you distance yourself, period, or even cut off contact. I have the impression you're clinging to hope that it might work out after all, and it will eat you alive if you don't watch out.

So essentially, either way, you have to distance yourself. And once you've created enough distance and can reflect on everything in a calmer matter, you can decide which path you want to go down.

Hope this helps. You sound like a genuinely kind and loving person - qualities that make going through something like this that much more difficult. And honestly, a psychologist might not be a bad idea, either. We're just random strangers on the internet, a psychologist will be able to help you much better.