this post was submitted on 08 Aug 2024
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Response to a bear attack depends on the type of attack, not the type of bear.
If it’s a defensive attack, play dead. If it’s a predatory attack, then fight back.
If it's a defensive attack then stop being offensive towards bears. If it's a predatory attack then start being more offensive towards bears.
What do you think would be the most offensive thing to say to a bear? Or maybe there’s a hand gesture or something that’s really taboo?
I just want to be prepared in case I ever need to know.
"Your mama was a rug!"
"Your momma is my rug"
Or possibly
"DJ Vance's couch is made out of your momma. Allegedlys"
"There's nothing but lite beer left in the cooler."