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Ice machine
Infinite bedside ice
I'm picturing this thing literally on your nightstand. Please tell me I'm right.
Very nearly! I have desk that I scrounged from the garbage literally right up against the bed and a nightstand right next to it. It's on the desk since the nightstand holds my TV.
So it's not literally on a nightstand, but it is literally bedside, i.e. I can use it without getting out of bed.
Does it not make tons of noise?
We have an ice machine in the freezer and often it is the loudest thing in the entire house. I also have a mini fridge in the office and the compressor on it runs every few minutes. It would be awful to try to sleep in there
Dude OP isn't even mortal at this point; he has ascended to godhood. That compressor sound and ice dropping into the plastic basket only powers him up.
Haha, that and the two running box fans I have on full blast pointing at my head and pillow are my greatest sources of comfort.
Yes I like being really really cold.
Not really? Although I'm probably way more tolerant to (wideband!) noise than others because I sleep literally inches from two box fans.
But you don't need to run it while you're sleeping. It goes from room temperature to ice in under 10 minutes (20 minutes for the "good" ice after the insides have had a bit of time to cool down).
To be clear, what I have is a Frigidaire portable ice maker. Here's its Walmart product page, although I can't vouch for Walmart's website respecting your privacy.
I actually bought a knockoff of this a couple years ago off Amazon, and it worked for about a year, but:
So far, the Frigidaire is a much better unit, and I use it tremendously more often because I don't have to babysit the thing and constantly override the infrared sensor.
The water supply is just an ordinary tank. Basically just open the lid, dump a Super Big Gulp of water into the tank every few hours and you're set. Everything is self contained.
It doesn't keep the ice cool for you, i.e. it's not a freezer. Once the ice gets dumped in the bucket, you're on your own.
So if you go down this route, I recommend getting a decent version of it. Mine cost about $87 in store from Walmart but I really bought this unit as an impulse buy, so I imagine you can get it cheaper if you do some shopping.