this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2024
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Do you honestly think that's how I interact with these people? I'm sorry, but what are you founding this assumption on? The way I voice my internal thoughts when I am on a message board? I don't need a lesson in diplomacy asshole, I practice it everyday and I don't need someone preaching at me how I should be interacting with these people as if I never attended kindergarten.
You remind me very much of my elementary school principal whose sparkling innovation to combating bullying was to tell students that when they were getting bullied they should put their hand out like they were directing traffic and say "Hey, I respect you, please respect me. "... Not one of us even young as we were were idiots enough to believe that wouldn't make things worse.
This inflated sense of "Freedom of Speech" in people doesn't just come with a caveat of belief that they can say what they want without consequences it also comes with a belief that they are entitled to broadcast wherever they see fit irrespective of circumstance or harm. When you challenge that entitlement in any way they have been trained to veiw you as a threat to fucking democracy and some of them will see fit to retaliate. Which is why all those useless harassment seminars need a gods damned update.
And no I am not going to "get a new job" I am a 12 year veteran in film in one of the most trans accepting places on the planet. This is my career. Want to talk tonedeaf? It's telling someone facing a systemic prosecution to abandon their progress with the assumption it's gunna be better elsewhere.
No, I don't think that's how you interact with those people, and I didn't make the assumption that you did.
But, when people feel strongly about something (to where that's your preferred word choice, and likely your internal feeling on the matter) that comes across, consciously or otherwise, and blocks communication. Ever talk to someone who's all friendly in word, but you know they would be screaming at you if they could?
It shows.
Clearly not. Your diplomacy is the stuff of legends.
Uh-huh. ..your capacity to hold to your own principles appears to be lacking. I don't entirely agree with your principles, anyways, but at least they could be consistently applied. There is a massive difference between bullying and simply discussing something. I have seen bullying occur in sidelong ways. But not everybody who discusses this stuff is doing so. There are real considerations that need to be addressed, and people will address them, in time - partly through conversations wherever people meet up, including sometimes on-the-clock at work. I can say what I'd do in your situation whether it's bullying or otherwise, but you're clearly disinterested in that.
It's not always going to be better elsewhere, that's true. But what you can't work around and won't leave, you need to work with. And although it's a lot to carry, that puts the ball in your court. People aren't born knowing you and being familiar with your situation, your quirks, your experiences, your history. That's you. Not them. The rest comes from communication.
..and if that doesn't work, you go your own ways, or fight, I suppose. That's life, and it's the foundation of all this civilization, and of all things we've discovered that are generally better than simply fighting. But if those better things don't work, it's back to the foundation.
Let me be clear. You come across as smug. Complacent. Self centered. Your privilege places you in a position where your deal is accepted as the norm... But when you preach from that position don't expect anyone who doesn't share your position to thank you for it. Your reaction to the frustration is essentially to say "Well that's tough but that's how it is." Which is in so many words just saying "Fuck you."
"Oh I'm not going to read all that but here's my opinion anyway" is saying "Oh you aren't deserving of my most basic consideration".
Your 'diplomacy' lacks humanity. It's just a thin veneer. Really you are a content bystander who self soothes that really there isn't anything you should be doing because really that would be taking sides. All I said is that the consequences of those people's actions are I find them a nuisance to be around and here you are finding that so offensive that you feel the need to dicker me into saying that what they are doing is fine actually and that it doesn't cause me any adverse mental health effects or physical stress symptoms... So what you want me to lie to make you feel better about doing nothing? No let's face it you want to do worse than nothing. You want to shore up the positions of and act as the white knight for the people who find it perfectly acceptable to make my workplace harder to be in.
You are an asshole who doesn't want to have a discussion in earnest, you just want to have a venue to feel superior. Like some bastion of decorum and logic while lacking any flexibility of thought. You are just a troll and you have had enough of my time.
Let me be clear: your opinion matters little to me, because you're not willing to work together with others that have a different world view. ..just another unidentified zealot.