K (189?–?) Soviet pioneer. From Kazan, Tartarstan, USSR, K was diagnosed as a ‘transvestite’ in 1937.
She was given permission by the People’s Court to wear female clothing, her identity papers were changed to her female name, and her name was removed from the military recruitment rolls.
She was featured in a 1957 gynaecology textbook.
M.G. Serdiukov. Sudebnaia ginekologiia I sudebnoi akusherstvo. Moscow: Meditsina 1957: 47-8.
Dan Healey. Homosexual Desire in Revolutionary Russia: The Regulation of Sexual and Gender Dissent. Chicago and London: The University of Chicago Press, 2001: fig 24.
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nostalgia/regret?
I attended an event at my high school, and seeing people do things I used to do makes me feel a sense of nostalgia and simultaneously regret. I never thought I would feel like this, but the note that goes on the more I regret not transitioning earlier. I had most of the mental pieces I needed when I was in school, and I just wasn't able to get past certain mental blocks, or bring myself to care. I feel nostalgia, not entirely for what happened, but for what could have been, what I could have done, how much I could have lived. Instead I made my way through school mostly as a husk going through the motions, mistaking getting better at doing that for living.I already came to terms with all of this, and I understand that things happen a certain way, and my life might have been different if I transitioned earlier. I could never resist thinking about alternate history, but now I do it for myself as well.
I once again posted before journaling. Sorry for venting 😅
On the bright side, I can now build a foundation for which to interact with others, and see practically starting from scratch as a "fresh start"! I know it'll happen eventually, once I get out of this weird moratorium phase of my life.
This place is just everyone’s journal when they don’t have a journal on hand.