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Democrats don't usually force shutdowns because the people most likely to suffer under a shutdown are federal, state, and local government employees, people who work in academia, and people in major metropolitan areas, all of whom make up a significant portion of the Democratic base. It doesn't make sense to force a shutdown if your own voters are just going to blame you for the disruption it causes to their lives anyway.
Now there's far more to lose, and Trump is going to get the blame for it. Shutdown for a few weeks to protect a few hundred thousand federal workers for at least a year is a pretty safe gamble when you're not likely to get blamed for the short-term disruption anyway.
Of course I get all that but I will not believe them until they actually do it.
I am straight up calling the Dems cowards who lack the balls to do anything bold at all.
I am willing and hopeful to believe I am overly cynical but dang, look at that track record.
To your first point, there is a high likelyhood that the GOP will defund the programs the Dems want to keep anyway, or they will get DOGEd after the fact.
They can not expect promises to maintain social safety nets to be kept, so why bother trying to work with the right, let them get a taste of their own obstructionist excriment.
As a federal employee, we're pretty safe during a shutdown these days. As long as we have direct deposit for our paychecks through them, USAA and the like (military/federal banks and credit unions) have our backs. Back pay is (currently, by law) guaranteed when the furlough ends. Main health insurance continues uninterrupted, still have to pay out of pocket for dental and vision (not really bank breaking tbh)
https://www.usaa.com/inet/wc/ent-gov-shutdown-assistance-landing-mkt
Bring it the fuck on and put the screws to them.