this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2023
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An undercover police officer used his fake identity to deceive a woman into a 19-year relationship in which they became partners and had a child together, the Guardian can reveal.

The officer concealed his real identity from the woman for the duration of that period, never telling her his real occupation, and using his fictitious identity on the birth certificate of their son.

In 2020, after the couple were engaged to be married, the woman discovered that her fiance, whom she believed to be a businessman, was in fact a police officer who had subjected her to a sophisticated deception lasting almost two decades.

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[–] Godnroc@lemmy.world 29 points 1 year ago (8 children)

Now that is commitment to the bit.

[–] FlowVoid@midwest.social 14 points 1 year ago (7 children)

I'm not sure it was a bit.

He wasn't investigating her. If you are an undercover agent and meet someone new - off duty and unrelated to work - are you allowed to tell them your real name?

If not, if a single person is forced to choose between no intimate relationships and relationships only under a pseudonym, then the latter is the predictable choice.

[–] fred-kowalski@artemis.camp 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think the ethical choices are not what you laid out. In this case choose between relationship and job. People do it all the time.

[–] FlowVoid@midwest.social 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Or choose both. You may consider that unethical, but that doesn't mean it was insincere. People do unethical things all the time with sincere motivations.

[–] ARainyDayInSunnyCA@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sincerity is a poor defense of bad behavior.

[–] FlowVoid@midwest.social 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm not necessarily defending it, I'm pointing out that his commitment to her was quite possibly sincere and not a "bit".

[–] girlfreddy@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Lying and manipulation are not evidence of commitment to anyone but but his own selfish desires.

To argue the opposite is ingenuine at best.

[–] FlowVoid@midwest.social 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Being in a relationship with someone for 10+ years and raising a child with that person is strong evidence of commitment. Lying about one's birth name is not enough to prove otherwise.

[–] Eheran@lemmy.world 0 points 1 year ago

Noooonooonooo, He once did something... Let's say unwise, so naturally after 17 years it is all a pure lie! Some people really need to go out and touch grass. So disconnected form reality.

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