this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2025
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It's been a minute, but it was an automatic "no" when someone would answer "what are 5 things you can't live without" were stuff like food, water, and air. Yes, I know that. Tell me about yourself!
It was almost always men that answered that way.
I know I'm incredibly dull. I'm average looking. I was a single parent. A decent picture and a little about myself and I did alright though, even with the ladies.
I have bad news: lots of non-men also post useless stuff like "I can't live without water lol" or "what are you looking for: my keys lmfao"
Having a good profile is a skill, probably related to marketing, and some people have neither natural aptitude nor training in it.
Sure, people of every gender do it. I was, at the time, not filtering by gender. I noticed that the useless answers were usually from men.
It doesn't mean that men are inherently bad at it (some men had great profiles), but as a whole they presented themselves poorly compared to everyone else.
I believe you. I wonder if anyone's done studies on this to verify it's true, how true it is, and maybe figure out why it's true.
Not having the natural aptitude or training is a reasonable excuse to not having a good profile, but if you come to conclude that is why you don't have any matches you're not totally helpless. You can at least try and improve it. There is plenty of good suggestions in this thread alone.
One of the problems I think is there aren't good feedback mechanisms. If you have a bad profile, probably no one is going to tell you.
Well, some of the apps do have tutorials that try to help. I think Hinge even crammed an AI tool into the profile writing section. Maybe that helps some people. I think a lot of people just don't understand the assignent, and think their personality and charm will shine through even when it's not shown at all. Those people probably won't use the tools or take feedback.
I skip on a lot of blank or bad profiles, and wonder if those people think they're ugly or being screwed by the algorithm or whatever. I don't have a way to be like "you're not giving me anything to work with, and frankly this sole impression you're giving me reads as lazy and uninteresting"
"I like tacos! 🌮🌮🌮"
"ACKtually, there are certain molecules and bio-organisms you can't live without and-- Hey, where are you going!?"
I think it's nuts people don't think of it like a resume.