this post was submitted on 05 May 2025
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The world isn't real. This is simply too ridiculous to have happened. I have been in a coma for the last six years and this is all just a weird fantasy playing out in my mind.
Headline was inaccurate - they didn't bomb a place for a gender reveal. Instead they bombed a place that produced blue smoke for some other reason and joked about how it resembling a gender reveal. That's...not better but it's an important distinction - one is blowing shit up to announce it's a boy and the other is blowing shit up to blow shit up and then joking about the color of the smoke.
wait, but does that mean i’m in a coma, or im a figment of your imagination and im in your coma?
but i agree, it’s too absurdly horrible to be plausible
I think, therefore I am. You think, therefore you are.
well how do i know you think?
You don't, and neither do I.
fuck
Hey now it's not too bad, the sea pickles get by just fine while not thinking
well they’re just simulations too
I think I think, therefore I think I am.
You're either in your coma or their coma, but either way, you're in a coma!
it’s the only plausible explanation
I had a concussion in 2008 and I’m wondering if I didn’t wake up from it and any day now I’ll wake up in spring 2008.
shakes you vigorously
“Wake the fuck up and take us with you!”
"I'm tired of being a figment of this dickhead's imagination!"