this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2023
1020 points (96.6% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26838 readers
3754 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] PunnyName@lemmy.world 346 points 11 months ago (6 children)

"Being a lesbian sucks sometimes. You tell another girl she's a hottie, and she says, "thanks" like we're being friendly. I ain't just being friendly, I'm trying to fuck!"

I think I translated it correctly.

[–] ladicius@lemmy.world 129 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Thanks for translating. As a non native English speaker I nearly got a stroke trying to understand these.... words.

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 62 points 11 months ago (1 children)

To assist:

  • Lesbo: short for lesbian
  • Pish: an expression of frustration
  • Bangin': hot
  • nd: and
  • ye: you
  • am no: I'm not
  • tae: to
  • yer: your
  • pal: friend
  • shag: have sex with
[–] punkwalrus@lemmy.world 22 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (3 children)

I got all of that except "shag ye x," because it sounds like "shag (fuck) you x," where "x" is the subject that is a bit vague. Like, "I'm trying to shag you, love?" or "Fuck your ex," as in, the last person you broke up with?

[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 45 points 11 months ago (1 children)

"x" is a kiss, used as an informal "yours truly" in British English digital correspondence

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Wait, I thought 'x' was hug and 'o' was kiss. Have I been wrong all these years??

[–] sjmarf@sh.itjust.works 15 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

X is kiss, O is hug (at least, in the UK it is)

[–] teuast@lemmy.ca 5 points 11 months ago

that is also how it's always been explained to me

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 17 points 11 months ago

I could be wrong, but I thought the x at the end was just a cutesy sign-off. Like "xoxo" type of thing.

[–] ZeroTHM@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Pretty sure it's the x in "xoxo", the old convention for hugs and kisses.

[–] TSG_Asmodeus@lemmy.world 24 points 11 months ago (1 children)

xoxo... the old convention for hugs and kisses.

[–] trafficnab@lemmy.ca 18 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

The release of Shrek is closer to the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan and the invention of the Sony Walkman than it is to today

[–] rottingleaf@lemmy.zip 7 points 11 months ago

Now I want to cry.

[–] x4740N@lemmy.world 33 points 11 months ago (1 children)

As a native English speaker I nearly got a stroke trying to figure out what it said

[–] cmbabul@lemmy.world 14 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

I had to imagine Karen Gillan saying it

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] PunnyName@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Oh, new comedian unlocked! Yes!

[–] PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

Fern Brady

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Ah, ye daft bot! Could've at least tossed a wee upvote me way for the comment, aye?

[–] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 22 points 11 months ago

As a native English speaker, me too.

[–] ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world 17 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

Should watch still game. You'll end up with a brain aneurysm trying understand the Scottish pensioner's

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The Scottish pensioner is what?

[–] lseif@sopuli.xyz 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

it's not a contraction, it's possession.

the Scottish pensioner's [dialogue]

where the last word is omitted for brevity

[–] hoshikarakitaridia@sh.itjust.works 6 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I never knew you can just omit such key words.

[–] lseif@sopuli.xyz 4 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] halm@leminal.space 2 points 11 months ago

And if the sentence feels sparse you can drop "which" in there wherever, because apparently it's just filler now.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] lseif@sopuli.xyz 1 points 11 months ago

how will you ever cope

[–] Mr_Blott@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

You're weclome

[–] KnightontheSun@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)
[–] ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

Personally father ted takes the cake in my books I've still got father Jack Hacketts wise words ingrained into my head

  • drink feck arse girls

.such words of poetry such words of expression these words are moving pieces of poetry

[–] neptune@dmv.social 22 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Isn't "coming from you" a put down? Or does it more mean "you care about fashion and looks, so obviously you know"?

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 62 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It’s an amplifier. “You’re hot” makes it mean “someone as hot as you thinks I’m hot? Damn”, “you smell terrible” makes it mean “how the fuck do you of all people even notice my small with that rank odor”

[–] x4740N@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

“You’re hot”

Reminds me of that one scene in arcane

You're hot, cupcake

[–] PunnyName@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

Can't wait for a second season. That shit was too good!

[–] jpeps@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

It's ambiguous, but the 👸 emoji solidifies it as a positive comment.

[–] CobblerScholar@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago

...And she says, "thanks" knowing I'm a lesbian and appreciate female beauty sexually taking the complement more intensely. I ain't just being....

ITIFTFY?

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 9 points 11 months ago

I think gays and straights have the same problem, though.

[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Where i come from a shag is a party

[–] Iron_Lynx@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

That's a shag, a noun. What about the verb, to shag?

[–] teuast@lemmy.ca 4 points 11 months ago

where i come from it's a carpet

or just particularly thick pubes

[–] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

That's how I read it too.

Also, this is how a girl politely turns you down. I take heart that lesbians are in the same boat as hetero guys when it comes to this struggle. I read this and think "oh, girls are bad at this too!"