this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2024
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The stupid fucking thing is, it's not even like that. It woulda been way cooler if I'd busted down the door and put a huge analytical rant in there, but I really was not trying to start shit or anger anyone. I literally just extracted
this
dialogue exchange, and asked what "the principle of the thing" was. I think I was probably prodding at nerves though, with how irritated people got when I said 'ok, I won't try to understand it cause I probably never can'.
HAH....
Don't worry, when I tell this story to somebody else's kids, I'll make you look real good
Also... Did nobody give you a decent answer then?
Nah, I mean what I say in that linked comment is the guts of it, tl;dr it's a butch/femme bit so I'm supposed to shift my brain into the most archetypal 'male' and 'female' gender roles possible, it's like that, I guess. Femmes and ego-flattery apparently being the most iconic duo. I'm probably in a very small minority for having never really understood the butch/femme "thing", but oh well y'know?
That sucks, the more I think about it, the more I'm wanting to know what the author was going for.
Bad writing in the "men writing women" pile or friendly ribbing based on gender and stereotypical behavior pile?
I guarantee you 99% of lesbians & other sapphics will not read this the way I do, it's supposed to be fun and flirty and you aren't supposed to view it like Karuniya views Murati as a comedy replacement trad husband.
Considering that the author is a trans woman (first thing she said to me) that would be a really stupid charge. It's a cascade of subjective factors that make it read weird.
As an autist I only have the most vague relation to gender roles and even as a teen reading Stone Butch Blues, the butch/femme thing was lightly mistifying to me. I'm not overly surprised that making the "butch" a trans woman resulted in this, the weird neurotypical gender-norm woo-woo shit is just bonus trouble.
This has very quickly become my least favourite subject, I truly wish this chapter had just been cut. I think it's underwritten, Murati barely reacts throughout the entire thing, it doesn't give us much on Karuniya and my SPECIAL MIND has resulted in a whole mess.
It's worthy to note, I don't really get this shit, but that is fine and I've never once felt the need to yell loudly about how I do not comprehend butch/femme dynamics, I uncritically support people doing what makes them happy in their relationships. The main reason I'm doing so here is because (in this fictional context) it feels to me like it all comes from Karuniya's side and Murati barely reacts, so the balance of *weird gender role shit* feels deeply off. Murati just kind of exists while Karuniya is foisting all of this on her.
Me You
Not always understanding an author's/editor's choices in a written work of fiction and it causing a brain itch...