this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
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askchapo

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What's a good way to tell people who ask for my contact info that I don't do social media without sounding unintentionally condescending? (hexbear.net)
submitted 7 months ago by TheDeed@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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Sometimes people I just met (in a platonic context) will ask me things like "hey, what's your Instagram, let's keep in touch!"

My standard answer is that I don't do social media, but I have found that people take it as bragging perhaps? I get answers like "oh, good for you! I wish I didn't" or whatever.

If I say oh here's my number that seems too odd these days, people not that much younger than me (I'm 31) don't seem to text anymore. They use fb messenger or Instagram or others.

Also saying something like "I'm a privacy advocate and I use the fediverse" is also an odd thing to say unless I'm around techy people and even then it's weird tbh.

How do I approach this? I don't think I am better than people that use social media, its just not for me. I would prefer to text but I am not sure that works for a lot of people.

Or should I just bite the bullet and get an Instagram so that I don't seem weird, and then perhaps ask for further contact details via that platform?

Abstaining from social media can be extremely alienating.

autistic btw if you couldn't tell lmao, I have spent a lot of time thinking about this problem

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[–] Coolkidbozzy@hexbear.net 27 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Nobody would think you're being condescending by saying you don't use social media, that is the most normal thing you could say

I'm younger than you, but texting seems to be the #1 way everyone stays connected these days. Social media is more of a way to send memes

Obviously follow up by offering your number if you want to stay in touch with the person