this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2024
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sadness

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[–] HiImThomasPynchon@hexbear.net 31 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Yes, it's a type of cognitive dissonance.

Welcome to the human condition.

There, there.

[–] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] HiImThomasPynchon@hexbear.net 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I need to try read Gravity's Rainbow. Any tips?

[–] HiImThomasPynchon@hexbear.net 9 points 6 months ago

Be ready to consult the dictionary at any moment

[–] ElChapoDeChapo@hexbear.net 26 points 6 months ago
[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 24 points 6 months ago (1 children)

If it's in a romantic sense then you need to have a sword fight

[–] HiImThomasPynchon@hexbear.net 5 points 6 months ago

I mean there's a reason 'kiss' and 'kill' are only 1 letter apart

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 16 points 6 months ago
[–] Angel@hexbear.net 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Me to myself—the one that's somehow a narcissist with extremely low self-esteem

[–] FunkyStuff@hexbear.net 13 points 6 months ago

Isn't that actually pretty common for all cluster B disorders? Low self esteem but manifested in kinda the opposite way that it does for someone with depression, anxiety, etc. IDK, I know they're not even mutually exclusive, but I suspect you're not alone in having that intersection of experiences.

[–] EmoThugInMyPhase@hexbear.net 13 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

It is. If you want an extreme example, look at cases of school shooters or serial killers or really any bad criminal. The parents will often express disgust and disappointment, but still defend their children (e.g. he’s misunderstood, she’s a good kid). Part of it is denial or pride that they’re partially responsible (much of the time) for raising them, but people automatically get upset as if the parents are 100% in control of their feelings. They’re their parents. Maybe they do believe their kid has no responsibility, but no matter how much you hate your children for being monsters, there’s still a little biological part in your brain that says “but I’m still responsible for protecting you”, so they try to do that until the very end.

Another example is with abusive and dysfunctional families. Growing up I was constantly hit and verbally abused by everyone in my family, parents and siblings, to the point that I don’t consider that I really had siblings, just 4 parents. I never got to confide to anyone, had anyone to stand up for me, or do any of that for them. I’ll never forgive them for that, bur at the same time, I’m just tired. I’ll still go to their weddings and parties, but it will never be the same. As I said above, there’s a small biological part in me that says “you also took care of me”, and so when when they die, I will most likely shed a tear because of that, and I resent them for it because they don’t deserve that tear.

[–] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 12 points 6 months ago

Very easily

[–] FumpyAer@hexbear.net 10 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Yeah honestly that's a common theme in the blues. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvrfDeylTTY

Here is an example called Lover Man, but it doesn't have to be romantic either.

Invidious (private) link: https://inv.tux.pizza/watch?v=yvrfDeylTTY

Actually this isn't a good example now that I listened to the lyrics again, I'll see if I can find a better one.

[–] davel@hexbear.net 8 points 6 months ago

Sure you can. Take my wife, please!

[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 5 points 6 months ago

Yes you're describing my relationship with myself luffy-wave

[–] edge@hexbear.net 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I (romantically) love my only friend (he doesn't reciprocate) but in general he's kind of an asshole that only cares about himself.

I recently told him about a major life regret that directly relates to my current mental problems and he responded "regret is a ridiculous emotion since the past cannot be changed".

He's autistic (as am I), but that's just too far. It's fucking obvious that that's a shitty thing to say but he doesn't really care.

I hate him half the time and would be much better off not in love with him but it just won't go away.

[–] PM_ME_YOUR_FOUCAULTS@hexbear.net 4 points 6 months ago

Oh yeah, definitely

[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 3 points 6 months ago

Yeah. Communication can help to at least not have it a 1:1 ratio. Which way that skews is another story.

[–] Frank@hexbear.net 2 points 6 months ago

Yeah, they're basically the same emotion, and to quote Vehk love is just as extreme a form of violence as hate.

[–] QueerCommie@hexbear.net 2 points 6 months ago

Dialectics for the win, mutherfuckers.

[–] Balefirex@hexbear.net 2 points 6 months ago