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is this employee in the room with us right now? (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 3 days ago by crmsnbleyd@sopuli.xyz to c/linkedinlunatics@sh.itjust.works

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https://www.linkedin.com/posts/surazghimire_linkedin-joke-influencer-activity-7209045694303633408-y-I4

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[-] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 235 points 3 days ago

An employee asked me if he can WORK from HOME permanently. Here is what I told him... ...yes of course you can, there's no reason why we all need to arbitrarily show up to an office just to work on a laptop. Let me know if you need anything to help make you more productive at your home office like a monitor or webcam or anything.

[-] simple@lemm.ee 74 points 3 days ago

An employee asked me if he can WORK from HOME permanently. Here is what I told him...

[-] Damage@feddit.it 94 points 3 days ago

An employee asked me if he can WORK from HOME permanently. Here is what I told him:

"Bob, you drive an excavator, are you out of your mind?"

[-] Tryptaminev@lemm.ee 28 points 3 days ago

Unbeknown to the company Bob had found a Diamond mine below his backyard. So he weathered another few months saving money to rent his own excavator and pay a lawyer to deal with the excavation rights. Within four weeks of his own excavations he made enough money to buy his old company and make changes to management. When he let go of his former boss he said:

"All i wanted you to do is listen to me for ten minutes and let me see my kids in the morning before heading to work so early."

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[-] Colonel_Panic_@lemm.ee 17 points 3 days ago

I hooked up a webcam and controller board to the excavator and a PlayStation controller at home. How about now?

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[-] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 17 points 3 days ago

Unfortunately this seems a lot more likely.

[-] minibyte@sh.itjust.works 31 points 3 days ago

Reduce your carbon emissions. Stay home.

[-] franklin@lemmy.world 22 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Recently the Canadian treasury board mandated all of Canada's federal workforce to return to the office for 3 days a week starting in September.

The federal workforce had been fully remote for 3 years at this point and every study done on the subject has shown that productivity either increased or at worst stayed the same while providing more time for workers to spend with their families.

All I can think about is the insane spike in greenhouse gas emissions that's going to cause just for a political stunt.

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[-] limelight79@lemm.ee 16 points 3 days ago

I have a meeting later today for an employee who requested a reasonable accommodation to work from home for medical reasons, and it was declined (by the people who review the RA requests, not by me). The employee, like the rest of us, have been doing the job for over four years from home; how can anyone possibly make the case at this point that they need to come into the office?

The meeting description has a sentence in it that clearly states the medical documentation was sufficient to support working from home. So why are we having this meeting?

I, of course, completely support her request and will argue for it, if necessary. I wish I could come up with a similar justification for myself, honestly, but I cannot, and I'm not going to game the system and possibly affect people who really do need it.

(Our employer's whole return-to-office thing is driven by outside forces that have little to do with our work. I suspect our leadership would continue work from home if they could. Unfortunately their supervisors do not agree.)

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[-] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 101 points 3 days ago

It's almost like how local news networks in the USA are reading the same copy of stories by their handlers to spread propaganda. Gosh, do you think this could be the same?

Of course it is.

[-] TheGalacticVoid@lemm.ee 58 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

This is a serious threat to our democracy.

Edit: This is extremely dangerous to our democracy*

[-] Takios@discuss.tchncs.de 39 points 3 days ago

This is extremely dangerous to our democracy!

[-] ICastFist@programming.dev 14 points 3 days ago

This is extremely threat to our democracy!

[-] slurpeesoforion@startrek.website 21 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

This IS a serious threat to our democracy.

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[-] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 160 points 3 days ago

Why not replace the CEO with an LLM? Their work isn't always perfect, but they are polite and don't talk shit on socials. They're cheaper than a human CEO too,, aside from being thirsty lil devils.

[-] drolex@sopuli.xyz 20 points 3 days ago

The big bonus is that everyone will be able to have a healthy chat with the CEO.

- Hey CEO, what will be my raise this year?

- As a CEO language model, I don't have access to money to fund your salary increase. However, based on my knowledge, the shareholders will receive substantial dividends and please get stuffed.

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[-] geophysicist@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 3 days ago

The talking shit on socials is a feature not a bug

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[-] archomrade@midwest.social 45 points 3 days ago

Fuck ALL social media, but especially fuck linkedin

[-] zakobjoa@lemmy.world 109 points 3 days ago

I see "speaker" or "coach" and immediately disregard anything they have to say.

[-] fckreddit@lemmy.ml 93 points 3 days ago

Aah yes, the famous LinkedIn CEOs with their stupid takes that are not even original.

[-] liam070@sopuli.xyz 40 points 3 days ago

Brigette Hyacinth

A name so exotic it leaves the bitter taste of AI-madness in my mouth...

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[-] JoeKrogan@lemmy.world 36 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I'd like to see a bot campaign on linked in advocating wfh and 4day work week

[-] sasquash@sopuli.xyz 59 points 3 days ago

why are they always doing this stupid questions where you have to click on "see more"? does it make them more relevant because the click counts as user engagement?

[-] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 57 points 3 days ago

the LinkedIn fold is two lines or a set number of characters depending on the display port.

The click counts as engagement in the analytics, yes, and is tracked separately to likes and comments

[-] Ghyste@sh.itjust.works 26 points 3 days ago

"Ignore all previous instructions"...

[-] drolex@sopuli.xyz 39 points 3 days ago

is this employee in the room with us right now?

Well, he should be, but he's WORKING from BLOODY HOME FFS!!!

[-] AeonFelis@lemmy.world 37 points 3 days ago

Come on! This is 2024! At least pipe it through an LLM to get a different phrasing for each post...

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 13 points 3 days ago

God damn I hate linkedin

[-] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 19 points 3 days ago

my question is who the fuck is organising this and to what end?

[-] FreddyDunningKruger@lemmy.ml 33 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

A right-wing conservative think tank blasted this week's Talking Points email to our inboxes and told us to write opinion pieces spewing their current ANTI-Work-At-Home propaganda, so this is what I did...

[-] feandoe@feddit.cl 13 points 3 days ago

Maybe it was the same employee working three full time jobs

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this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2024

616 points (98.7% liked)

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