this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


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(page 3) 37 comments
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[–] zanyllama52@infosec.pub 5 points 4 weeks ago

Well, I would love it if my tightly wound boss would pull something like this. Way out of character.

As a college student, I walked into the multi-use bathroom, and proceeded to a urinal. Strange, rhythmic, wet sounds were coming from the lone stall in use. I thought, "Okay, what the hell is this?" and tried to wrap things up quick, in case things got weird. Too late. I then hear another strange sound from the stall, something like crinkling wax paper. None of this made sense to my young mind. Then I hear a wet "plop" from the stall, and more crinkling wax paper noises. I quickly finish up, and turn to leave. On the floor of the stall I can see a partially eaten Subway sandwich. Unbelievable

This base human then picks up the sandwich, and continues eating.

To this day, I do not eat Subway.

[–] EarthShipTechIntern@lemm.ee 5 points 4 weeks ago

Better out than in, as our holy green swamp ogre says

[–] Okokimup@lemmy.world 4 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Lauchmelder@feddit.org 4 points 4 weeks ago
[–] Wilzax@lemmy.world 3 points 4 weeks ago (5 children)
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[–] Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

I'd honestly ask them if they'd seen a doctor about that. No one should be that gassy on a regular basis.

[–] Unbecredible@lemm.ee 4 points 4 weeks ago (2 children)

All I do is fart. Except during the times when I'm holding in my farts so I can keep living among society. But even then I'm just quietly belching under my breath. All I am is gas. Held together in the loose shape of a man by the surface tension in a bubble of cheeseburger grease and the force of my will to eat another. Just one more. My urine is carbonated.

.

[–] NikkiDimes@lemmy.world 2 points 4 weeks ago

Are you me? I gas my poor boyfriend every day. I've just come to accept it at this point.

[–] Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 4 weeks ago

Have you seen a doctor about that? No one should be that gassy on a regular basis.

[–] AidsKitty@lemmy.world 1 points 4 weeks ago

Keep your distance?

[–] Schlemmy@lemmy.ml 1 points 4 weeks ago

Liquid ass. That's the solution.

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