this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2024
720 points (99.0% liked)

Greentext

3972 readers
1647 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 11 months ago
MODERATORS
 
top 23 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] StrongHorseWeakNeigh@lemmy.world 153 points 3 weeks ago

That robber said, "Actually, I don't want that smoke." And left very promptly.

[–] slaacaa@lemmy.world 111 points 3 weeks ago

“Uhm. Meow?”

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 90 points 3 weeks ago

Every time I read this it about has me crying laughing, it's perfect

[–] Kyrgizion@lemmy.world 70 points 3 weeks ago

Based and dominance established. Carry on.

[–] MacStache@programming.dev 63 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I don't get it. How did the cat know how to open the door?

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 25 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

How would a cat even know what a knitting needle was? Yarn is not for knitting in their world.

[–] MacStache@programming.dev 14 points 3 weeks ago

Maybe it was a knittycat? This post raises a lot of questions.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 6 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

It's the thing they need to remove from the ball of yarn to use it as intended, otherwise it just doesn't roll right.

[–] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago

Evolution, duh

[–] OsrsNeedsF2P@lemmy.ml 53 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] unreachable@lemmy.world 71 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 43 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Comment105@lemm.ee 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

You've not heard of the bearded lady?

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 19 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Oh, I have. I was just posting the gif of the rest of that video because the entire thing makes me die laughing every time. The tone of that old man's voice as he questions all of reality is truly something.

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I have not heard of anything you two funny kids are talking about.

… source?

[–] PM_Your_Nudes_Please@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)
[–] CeruleanRuin@lemmings.world 2 points 3 weeks ago

Well now I just have more questions.

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 3 weeks ago

It’s funny. I like it.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 1 points 3 weeks ago

It's a clip from a mcjuggernuggets video lol

[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Google daddy chill vine know your meme

[–] Comment105@lemm.ee 1 points 3 weeks ago

I'm gonna screenshot this nonsense and send it to the White House in 60s at the height of the Cuban Missile Crisis.

They'd nuke Earth instantly, get Fallout IRL going.

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 3 weeks ago

I spent some cool years on the internet being uncool, thinking I was too cool for internet shit.

(I mean, I was also deeply depressed, heavily traumatized, and unable to function beyond work and escapism for basically the entire period Vine existed.)