this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2024
374 points (97.2% liked)

The Onion

4698 readers
816 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
top 23 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 38 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I know this is satire because there is no way Trump has any musical talent.

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 24 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It would also require effort and a degree of hand-eye coordination not typical for those in his age group with his degree of mental deterioration.

[–] pearsaltchocolatebar@discuss.online 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

For a lot of geriatric musicians, playing is basically muscle memory.

[–] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That also takes dedicating a good chunk of time to practice.

Many elderly people don't have a lot to do with their time, so that seems like a good thing

[–] luciferofastora@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 months ago

...contingent on having built that memory from years of practice. I don't know if there's any instrument I can imagine Trump playing, aside from tooting his own horn even when there's nothing to toot about.

[–] phx@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 months ago

Honestly, if this ever really happened it would be one thing that actually might make me want to see such a rally.

[–] just_another_person@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Jokes on you, Onion, because that is very clearly a Vibraphone and not a Glockenspiel. DEUUUUHHHHHHHH

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Glockenspiel is a much funnier word, though 😁

[–] chuckleslord@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

Me, a true musician, they're all just sound sticks you hit. Unlike rain sticks (sound sticks you flip) and drum sticks (sound sticks to hit with)

[–] BassTurd@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Came for the headline, stayed for the picture, and really enjoyed the article. Well done The Onion.

[–] Synthuir@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 months ago

You should really look into their print edition that they just relaunched, then! Really cheap and a great way to support the new ownership.

[–] thejml@lemm.ee 14 points 2 months ago

And I’m sure it was the Best glockenspiel performance ever. Professional musicians have likely told him they’ve never heard anything as great.

[–] p5yk0t1km1r4ge@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I really hate this timeline. We are at a point now where I thought this was legit

[–] lulztard@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Oh. It's the onion. Didn't realize until well after deep into comments.

[–] morphballganon@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

He could always play classical... though that might cause his followers to grow some brain cells and leave.

[–] Phegan@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

I've never understood why classic is "smart people music".

I like a lot of classic music, but I don't think it should be considered any more cultured or intellectual than any other music.

[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

And he's a damned virtuoso.

[–] YerbaYerba@lemm.ee 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] watson387@sopuli.xyz 6 points 2 months ago

A true idiot

[–] BigMacHole@lemm.ee 3 points 2 months ago

I'm a Republican who Does His Own Research and The Onion is LIBRUL PROPAGANDA! WAKE UP Sheeple! Kid Rock would GLADLY play at Trump's Rally! The Onion is the DEEP STATE!

[–] huquad@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 months ago

Feeling hot hot hot!

[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 3 points 2 months ago

If only there weren't Republican musicians ...