this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2024
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[–] woodenskewer@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago

civil axle forfeiture

[–] WhyFlip@lemmy.world 90 points 2 days ago (1 children)

They're working tirelessly to find the perpetrators.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 15 points 2 days ago

I could just kiss you.

[–] bamfic@lemmy.world 12 points 2 days ago

Stop resisting!

[–] Etienne_Dahu@jlai.lu 42 points 2 days ago

All because the wheels were black.

[–] Hayduke@lemmy.world 262 points 3 days ago (3 children)

The department is working tirelessly to apprehend the criminals.

[–] CuriousRefugee@lemmy.ml 147 points 3 days ago (2 children)

"Stop laughing," the department chief said in an interview with WLMY. "This is a wheel problem for us."

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 52 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The officers have been reviewing security footage before beginning material investigations so that they can hit the ground running.

[–] anubis119@lemmy.world 46 points 3 days ago (1 children)

They aren't having a goodyear anymore.

[–] FigMcLargeHuge@sh.itjust.works 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

As to the suspects, at this time we are keeping our opinions unbiased.

[–] EtherWhack@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

But they keep shifting their stance

[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Eventually their investigation will come to a skidding halt, as they are burning rubber trying to find the suspects.

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Let's take a brake from this tired thread.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 21 points 3 days ago

might take awhile, the wheels of justice turn slowly.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 30 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Ah yes, forfeiture of their assets. This sounds familiar somehow...

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Those tires are criminals.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

They should have complied with the road.

[–] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 2 points 1 day ago

They were "radial" profiling them!

[–] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com -2 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Tires can't be criminals, they are inanimate objects. Only humans and some higher intelligent animals can break the law.

[–] gearheart@lemm.ee 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Bet your lots of fun at parties , 😉.

[–] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 2 points 1 day ago

Lol if you only knew.

[–] Snowclone@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

You'd think that but in the American legal system corporations are civil rights bearing people, you're not related to your parents unless you maintain the same address, and objects can be suspected and tried for criminal acts and assumed guilty until proven otherwise.

[–] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

When was the last time a corp was sentenced to death and executed?

[–] desktop_user@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

that isn't the point, also the death penalty is almost never used anyway

[–] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 3 points 1 day ago

My point is they are super citizens, with more rights and privileges and less things binding them.

[–] Nasan@sopuli.xyz 76 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Return just the wheels, the tires need to be examined further and will take an additional 6-18 business months

[–] EtherWhack@lemmy.world 39 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Just cut them open, plenty of smugglers put bricks of product inside.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago

smells like they're trafficking bricks of justice in those tires.

[–] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 35 points 3 days ago
[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 32 points 3 days ago

After six months the tires are sent to the city dump.

City Waste Landfill? City Police Precinct? Easy mistake when all these departments just look the same, you know.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 50 points 3 days ago (1 children)

They weren't stolen .... they can be fetched and returned from their last known location in Afghanistan

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago

Based and Legalism Pilled