this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2023
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Senate Republican Leader Mitch McConnell’s (R-Ky.) health scare has Republican senators wondering whether the 81-year-old lawmaker will stay in the top job beyond the 2024 election and who might eventually replace him.

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[–] BlackPenguins@lemmy.world 73 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They'll replace him with the newer model - a racist, elderly 75 year old man.

[–] Hyperreality@kbin.social 27 points 1 year ago

That's too much of a risk for the GOP. At that age they're more able to molest the interns again.

Best to replace Mitch with someone who is uncertain if lemonade will catch on and is skeptical of non-wooden dental implants.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 21 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Don't worry, they'll find an asshole to replace him. It is way easier than to find a non-asshole in that party, anyway.

[–] RojoSanIchiban@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They don't even have to work very hard given Rand fucking Paul still has a seat. May as well just fly over a Russian oligarch to replace him.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

May as well just fly over a Russian oligarch to replace him.

That would streamline GOP propaganda in quite a way, yes.

[–] Mookulator@wirebase.org 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Might be hard to find another asshole who’s as ruthless about loopholes and dirty tricks. I’d say there’s a 90% chance that replacing him weakens the republicans.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Lets hope for the best (for humanity, not for them).

[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm sure they'll find an asshole to replace him. I'm just afraid they'll find a worse asshole than him.

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Well, that's always the risk with the GOP.

[–] clgoh@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

I wonder which asshole is more likely to replace him in the current senators.

Rick Scott?

[–] El_Supreme_O@lemm.ee 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Health scare? What health scare? Most pleasant video I have seen in a while.

I watch it on loop every morning. Sunshine and bluebirds in my heart while I sip my coffee, every time. 🤗

[–] joe@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Whomever they get to replace him has a big shell to fill. Perhaps Bowser is available? The internet tells me he's only 34.

[–] 1bluepixel@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

"Impeaches, peaches, peaches, peaches, peaches..."

[–] DocSophie@kbin.social 9 points 1 year ago

I think Bowser's a little busy being the president of Nintendo of America.

[–] refurbishedrefurbisher@lemmy.sdf.org 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"Shadow race" definitely sounds like democracy to me.

[–] Slacking@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 year ago

The shadow part is usually implied, I'm surprised to see it actually written

[–] meldroc@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

Yep, all of the sudden they're worried! Someone must've found Mitch's horcruxes!

[–] Hyperreality@kbin.social 8 points 1 year ago

My vote's for Lord Buckethead.

Although at this rate, Mitch will be replaced by a bucket filled with his ashes.

[–] xc2215x@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

It is time for him to retire. Glad the race is being focused on.

[–] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@kbin.social 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Shadow Race… really? Right when we are finally about to be rid of this reptilian‽ What’s next for the GOP? LGM? Sentient slime mold?

[–] thorbot@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

I figured he’d just don the ring wraith attire and his corporeal form would fade into shadow

[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 1 points 1 year ago

I'm expecting John Thune v. Rick Scott as the main fight.