Pretty sure this is almost exactly how the only game of magic the gathering went. I am pretty sure that I played 2 hands but neither of them went any better then a few seconds and I couldn't understand any of it.
this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2024
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Me, a noob playing MTG with a seasoned player with a red deck.
I don’t understand what happened but at the end of his first turn I had less than 10 points remaining.
Is 10 points not many points left?
I haven't played Magic much, but boy let me tell you that this is Yu-Gi-Oh in a nutshell!
FTKs should never have been allowed.
This is exactly what happened the day many years ago when my grandparents, who were bridge fanatics, tried to teach the game to my mother and I. The whole thing was like they were speaking another language.
Every time this comic gets reposted it gives me an opportunity to, in turn, post this.
Response.
To explain this to the uninitiated: (First follow another explanation of the original combo)
In Magic spells are not in effect immediately, instead they go on the stack, before they are resolved. Spells from a stack are resolved in LiFo order, so last in, first out. Instants, like Gut Shot, can be put on the stack at any time by any player (simplified).
So Enemy gets his 21 mana with channel, you let that resolve, he has 1 life. He pumps it all into the fireball, now you act. While fireball is on the stack you cast Gut Shot, paying with 2 life of your 20. It goes on the stack. Your enemy hopefully has no response, without any mana left in his pool, and he looses his last life and the game.
When a player looses the game all his spells are removed from the stack, so you really win and there is no draw.
You stopped his combo with 4 cards worth unreal amounts of money with a single card worth about 50ct.
And here I was thinking you just shoot assholes who play lame combos like that
Why wait all the way to Turn 1?
Let the newbie go first, and kill them in their first upkeep with Hulk Flash.
?
Yeah, I’d like a breakdown as well. I definitely don’t know enough about MTG.
You start with 20 life.
Each of these spells must be played on your turn.
Mox Ruby is free to play with a 0 casting cost. Tap that (turn it sideways) to add 1 mountain (red mana: 🌄) to your mana pool. You don't remove it from the board.
You have 1 mana in your mana pool: 🌄
Black Lotus is free to play with a 0 casting cost. You can turn it sideways, remove it from the board into your graveyard pile, and add 3 of any color to your mana pool. Choose green for forests: 🌲🌲🌲
You now have 4 total mana: 🌄 🌲 🌲 🌲
Channel costs 🌲🌲. Cast that, remove 🌲 🌲 from the mana pool, and pay 19 of your 20 starting life, so that you gain 19 colorless mana (can be used for most spells). Place Channel into the graveyard pile.
Your mana pool will now have a total of 21 mana: 🌄 🌲 + 19 colorless
Fireball costs 🌄 + any amount of mana you decide, up to how much you have available. So you then use your remaining 🌲+ 19 to do 20 damage to your opponent.
You win with 1 life remaining.
It all makes sense when someone explains it but the minute I walk away my general impression of magic can be summed up by ProZD's cow videos.
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLlE9kZJTsDtYqR2lEuWZkyKvfbTN3b6OQ
This is the only answer.
This was the only comment that actually explained it. Thank you.
With those four cards you can turn 1 kill. Magic typically starts with each player at 20 life. Black lotus adds three green mana. Channel costs two, but lets you pay one life to add one generic mana as many times as you want. Mox ruby pays for the red in fireball. Pay 19 life for 19 mana, with the last green you have 20 extra mana to invest into fireball, dealing 20 damage to your opponent and ending the game.
Great explanation, thanks
This is a first turn win in MTG (with ridiculous old, expensive cards).
The first card on the left lets you get three free green mana (currency used to cast cards). This is used to cast the next card, which requires green.
The next card let's you sacrifice your own health and turn that into mana. This only gives colorless mana.
The third card is another free mana, this time red. One red is required to cast the 4th card.
The 4th card does enough damage to your opponent to kill them.
If you draw this hand, your opponent has zero ways to respond, and the game is no longer fun.
If you draw this hand, your opponent has zero ways to respond, and the game is no longer fun.
Of course, that's the joke. The only winning move is not to play.
There is a meta-joke in that there are a few ways to respond to this, but only if you know it's coming. @SkyezOpen@lemmy.world responded with one. If your opponent also has a way to get fast mana out, a simple Lightning Bolt will also do it if it's inserted between your Channel and Fireball. Or anything that counters your fireball, which will leave you standing there with your pants down around your ankles, 1 life, and probably an empty hand.
Then the meta-meta-joke is if you are known to be packing this combo, people around you will deliberately structure their decks around countering your stupid 1 turn win (if they will even allow you to employ it at all, given that Black Lotus is very, thoroughly, extremely banned specifically because of this combo), but this requires making sacrifices to their usual strategy and then you can show up unannounced with a different deck instead...
I like how your use of "meta-joke" is in itself a meta joke.
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This is a wild turn one combo that will win if both players have the same starting life. Assume 20 life each, you play the first card to give you 3 green mana, you play the second card using 2 green mana. This card let's you use 19 of your life for mana leaving you at 1 life and 19 manager + 1 from the previous card. You play the third card which gives you one red mana (totals are 20 green, 1 red) and finally now you can use the last card by paying one red and X (X can be any number you choose as long as you can pay it). In this case X is going to be 20, for the 20 green you had dealing a perfect 20 damage to the other player leaving them at 0 life and yourself at 1 life.
This combo works for whatever life total as long as yours is greater than or equal to Theirs
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This was my experience with MTG. Dude was all excited to “teach” me how to play, made a deck for me and everything, and then whomped me on the second turn.
I never played again and still don’t know how
There are of course also Magic: The Gathering decks that can do that on a lucky first hand.
My favorite is this one, which in the abstract can do literally anything a computer can do. Yes, You can in theory run Crysis on a Magic deck. During your opponent's turn.
I never really played MtG, but I love reading about degenerate combos. My favourite uses an unglued (or un- something) card that can remove any card with a silver border you can see from your seat from play. Doesn't have to be a card in the game you're playing, other people nearby as valid targets.
The silver border part makes sure it can only be played on other silly un- cards, but there's a combo with a card allowing to change a colour in an effect to something else, meaning with a bit of support from a few other cards you could technically use this to nuke all cards in all unrelated games around you.
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It's scary how often you post memes that happen to be relevant to a conversation I was having IRL. Are you spying on me, Stamets? :P
Occasionally. I get bored. Sue me.
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This has been my experience all 6 times I've tried to learn euchre.
I learned it in high school because my girlfriend and a bunch of her friends played it at lunch, but I couldn't tell you the first thing about playing it now.
Oh, come on, euchre isn't that bad. At the very least, you're playing with a partner that has a vested interest in helping you. Plus, if you're playing turn-up, it takes at least three hands to win if you're playing to 11 (and that's with the other team going alone and making it all three times).
Unless you're playing bid euchre, in which case you can score...I don't know... up to 12 points per hand if you go alone? I'm a bit fuzzy on the scoring for bid euchre as it's been years since I played and I didn't grow up with it, but IIRC you usually play to a much higher point value, so it still takes a couple rounds to get to a win. But if you're just learning, you probably shouldn't be playing bid euchre, anyway.
Of course, if the other team gets lucky you can wind up with each if those hands bring decided in one trick each, so it can feel like the posted comic, but at least the rules aren't as complicated as M:tG.
You know, rereading what I just wrote, maybe it is nearly as bad as Magic.
Theres just too many rules that completely blow the game if you break them. People tell me there's room for strategy but everything feels predetermined by the cards you get and of course there's that guy over your shoulder telling you "can't do that" every time you try something and oh great the other team knows my cards now, game over. Like yeah lol fuck this you guys can play without me.
There's really just one rule in the basic euchre ruleset I know that you can't break: failing to follow suit. Doing that ends the hand and results in points for your opponent.
You are kinda right about your cards predetermining play though - once you get really good and are playing with other people who are really good, whole rounds can be played in minutes, because everyone just knows what to play.
Agreed. There is still strategy, but it comes in picking the suit and the bidding.
I found it easier to play with bots to learn, they are more forgiving and are a bit bad at the game as well.
Cardgames.io/euchre/
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I unintentionally did this once. I still feel bad about it 7 years later. But hey, I won.
Soooo funny.
Once though, someone was beating me at MTG and they did enough damage to kill me / win the game, but then just kept playing cards 'cause they could, to do more damage.
Kyle, if you're out there... I get it, you hate me. Just stop.
Third time's the farm
I honestly loved playing yugioh back in like 2004 ish. A buddy of mine told me he played online and offered to show me how to do it. It was almost exactly this. It might be fun for someone who's played the whole time, but I liked the clever decks with card combos that would take time to build up.
Yeah, for me part of the fun of Yu-Gi-Oh was having really cool cards in your deck that was a big moment when you summoned them (I was a kid, times were simple)
But now newer decks summon and tribute like 8 monsters in a single turn, it's outrageous, and if you don't know every card by heart you'll just be stun locked trying to figure out why you got destroyed
That's why I prefer to play legacy decks if at all
It's why I've found board games designed as deck builders a lot more fun. Everyone is vying for the same cards so it's more about how you make your deck and involves strategy during play rather than lucky draws.
Star realms is a pretty fun example of this. Dominion is another, although doesn't really feel quite the same as a deck builder.
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This is often what it feels like when learning a new card game with people who know the game. You lose every round for the first week and it's supposed to be "fun".
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I've been trying this new pokemon tcg pocket. Going second is actually a huge advantage.
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