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Fuck, you tricked me

I've got another confession to make

I'm your fool

I actually did start the fire. Contrary to the song lyrics

This might get me laughed out of the room but here goes nothing:

I am a genuine leftist. I’m not actually a fed, and I’ve wasted four and a half years posting on here without even getting paid to do so

Ive gotten like 4 accounts banned from here for being stupid

Dante explaining that the current living pope in his time is actually in hell and is only living because his body is taken over by a demon and getting away with it is pretty rad.

In real life I sometimes tell more than one joke.

god i so desperately want to bare my soul

Someone left a cheesestick in the fridge at work for a month, one day I got hit by the starvings and ate it. It was sitting alone there a whole month no name on it getting shuffled all over the empty ass fridge. Then that day figures, coworker was looking for her aged back to the big bang cheesestick. Also whenever you have to break bad news at work or talk about a fuck up inc bring bribe food, the worse the news the more delicious your consolation snack should be. I had to miss out a lot on work, so I brought the most unhealthy snack I could conjure up, seemed to work out in my favor.

For years I would get in for like a dollar at the pool since under 18s got in for a dollar, I was damn 31 still doing it.

At work there was some hot dude chasing his toddler who was being legendarily bad running everywhere and grabbing random shit, first the troubled father caught me eyeing him, I simply couldn't help it man was built like a centaur for years, obviously he was furious, then he was enraged that I loled at his agony of chasing the child. I still laugh when I think of it cuz the child jumped onto a display of jeans and beamed a smile and danced like an evil monkey while the father lost the ability to speak but angry grunts. There was some rando old lady and she also loled, so I don't feel so bad.

Realizing how much I relied on pfp to distinguish people here lately, anyway just checking to see if anyone had a crush on me. Also I'm not actually a hippo despite what my pfp my indicate.

My username is a reference to a couple of gmen from an episode of the Venture Bros but my pfp is the Monarch, a completely different character, only connected in that the aforementioned gmen call themselves lepidopterists to imply that they're researching him (because of the butterfly motif in his costume and villainous accoutrements).

I realize this and it eats away at me that the two aren't in alignment but I've grown attached to both the pfp and the handle and I don't think I can change it now.

I am a Dua Lipa simp.

I buy lots of socialist books but rarely read them.

Sometimes I stay in bed until noon.

I haven't finished State and Revolution.