this post was submitted on 07 Jun 2025
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Witches VS Patriarchy

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[–] Gorilladrums@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago (2 children)

This site is a good reference point to see if I'm still a normal person. If I find myself agreeing too much with the takes and memes here then that means that I've become out of touch and I need to go outside and touch grass for awhile. So far so good.

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[–] Hellsfire29@lemmy.world -5 points 6 days ago

Well, people don't like posers or wearing a shirt just because of a trend. Those hardcore fans can be toxic. Never seen an iron maiden fan do that though.

Watching stolen valor videos on YouTube is fun to watch thou. Especially those who are truly committing it. People just wearing a camo jacket for style or even pants are a bit overboard.

Reminds me of a scene from the Deer Hunter.

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 76 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (8 children)

I once knew a girl who shaved her head bald. Her default response to "Does the carpet match the drapes?" was "That depends, is my head bleeding?"

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[–] barneypiccolo@lemm.ee 61 points 1 week ago (13 children)

My job includes doing a lot of events on college campuses, so I see a lot of t-shirts for classic rock bands. I see a Dark Side of the Moon shirt at nearly every event. I'm a huge lifelong musician and music lover, so I often ask if they've listened to that album. If they have, we have a nice discussion about Pink Floyd. If not, I encourage them to give it a listen, because it is an album that has literally changed people's lives.

One girl told me she hadn't heard it, but her GRANDMOTHER told her it was the greatest album ever made. First of all: Grandmother? That hurt. Secondly, I told her grandma may be right, go listen to that album.

Recently, someone was wearing an Abby Road shirt, so I asked. They turned out to be a huge Beatles fan, and we had a nice conversation about it.

OTOH, one girl had on a Kiss shirt, so I asked her, and she didn't even know that Kiss was a band. She just liked the shirt.

Not everyone asking is looking to start an argument. Often we are just older music fans who are thrilled to see young people embracing the great rock music of the classic era, and want to talk to them about it. Engage those older music lovers, they may be able to tell you about other albums or artists you might like, or tell cool stories about shows they've been to. In my case, I worked for many years on the record biz, and have lots of stories of personal meetings and backstage experiences with truly legendary musicians. Young music lovers enjoy my stories, but if you responded with "name 5 women who trust you," I'd just write you off as a defensive, confrontational jerk, and ignore you. No fun stories for you.

[–] miridius@lemmy.world 40 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (7 children)

This is lovely and wholesome, but you're not the type of person the post is about.

Edit: sorry I just realised my comment was kinda glib, so let me elaborate. You didn't specify but I assumed you approached those women with a friendly air, having a genuine desire to have a conversation with them as equals, and said something like "oh I love that album, have you listened to it?" Putting yourself in their shoes, compare that to a guy who approaches them aggressively, having a deep seated resentment for all women, and lashes out with "pretending you like that band huh? Prove it then, name 5 of their songs!"

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[–] Lembot_0003@lemmy.zip 40 points 1 week ago (7 children)

Is that comeback considered "good"? Why? It doesn't even make any sense.

[–] cynar@lemmy.world 94 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The sort of men who come out with phrases like that are (almost universally) arseholes. Having a default response, that can be rolled out quickly, and hit at emotional sore spots is useful.

As for why it works, if they are willing to come out with that line, then either a massively misogynistic, or badly socially stunted and rude. Both will drive women away aggressively (and likely a lot of male friends).

[–] agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works 15 points 1 week ago (6 children)

How often does that line happen? I can definitely see "What's your favorite song/album?", that's just making conversation based on a common interest. And it can be kinda disappointing if you thought you were gonna get to talk about a band you like, but the person just liked the design and hasn't even heard them.

But "Name 5 songs"? I thought that just happened in memes.

[–] Susaga@sh.itjust.works 31 points 1 week ago (2 children)

What do you think the memes were based on? Gatekeeping is a real thing, and the "name 5 songs" is a genuine thing they'd to to "test" people as "real" fans.

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[–] cynar@lemmy.world 23 points 1 week ago

It's a bit of a weaponised meme. A small number of guys will use it as either a put down, or a really bad attempt at a negging pickup line. Unfortunately, they are the sort to do it to a depressing number of women, without thinking that maybe they are the arsehole, not the women turning him down.

It's also quite dependent on the demographic. E.g. It's far more likely to come up at music festivals etc.

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[–] LadyButterfly@lazysoci.al 29 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Him asking her to name 5 songs is nasty, it shows he's a bully whose looking to embarrass her. That indicates women are less likely to trust him

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[–] Michal@programming.dev 23 points 1 week ago

Because it's an asshole thing to say. Any comeback will be good.

[–] QuoVadisHomines@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Because the kind of guy that asks random people to prove their fandom probably does not have many close friends.

[–] prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Even more so the point is that they’re a creep.

Men policing women’s clothing is creepy, or talking down to other people as gatekeepers … also creepy.

The response is pointing out they’re a creep.

I hope my fellow men can understand.

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[–] MystValkyrie@lemmy.blahaj.zone 35 points 1 week ago (5 children)

The comments on this post are examples why there are so few women on Lemmy lol.

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[–] MrSmith@lemmy.world 35 points 1 week ago (13 children)

This sounds like a US thing.

People just don't go to other people saying some random shit where I'm from. Unless they're crazy, beggars, or tourists from the US. If you come to anorher person and don't start your sentence with "excuse me" or "sorry", you're getting ignored.

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[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 31 points 1 week ago (7 children)

Nice notion, but won't work.
Those people will happily list every women they know, however distant.
Many men don't even have a concept for this kind of "trust".

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[–] MystValkyrie@lemmy.blahaj.zone 23 points 1 week ago (6 children)

I live in fear of this type of person, especially as someone who listens to metal which tends to be male-dominated. I'm an album person and I'm not always checking the table of contents when I listen. There are bands I've been a fan of for over a decade that I don't have five songs memorized for. I love these bands and I don't think I'm fake for liking them or wearing a shirt.

[–] Initiateofthevoid@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

My brain just doesn't respond well to those type of questions anyway. Most brains don't, which is why those 'gotcha' street interview videos are so common. Most of those people aren't idiots, they're just panicking.

"Name 5 nations" "..uhhhhh, Antarctica, Canada, Texas, London, Taiwan"

"Oof, two out of five, no money for you, just public shame."

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[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 18 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Suddenly realizing how many women I knew have come out as non-binary "Uhhh, uhhh... Well my wife? Wait, no, um, my friend? No, they're not- uh,"

[–] RedGreenBlue@lemmy.zip 15 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

"I have not made any attempt to memorize song names"

"I don't want to share names of family and friends"

If I was asked to give names, I would strongly consider listing names from Mambo No. 5. While humming the tune to remember the names.

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[–] Leviathan@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I've listened to Vital Remains' Let Us Pray once every couple weeks for the past 15 years and can't name one song off of the album. I can play the guitar parts along to it, half the time I can't even remember the name of the band. This is not vital info to my brain.

I would suggest telling them to go fuck themselves and moving on.

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[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 13 points 1 week ago (13 children)

People who wear band shirts, does this actually happen?

[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 6 days ago

My friend was wearing a Ramones shirt and I asked her to name a single member of the band.

[–] redwattlebird@lemmings.world 14 points 1 week ago

Nope. Every once in a long while someone will say "Nice shirt!".

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