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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/tuesday-next22 on 2025-06-25 03:07:39+00:00.
I'm completely horrified about this, but let's go. Before I start the story I want to make clear that I believe that everyone, no matter what gender they identify with, is equal. The second thing you should know is when reading just pretend my name is something like Muhammed and I'm a brown man. Lastly you should also know I'm not the smoothest person socially.
Okay, so I work at a gigantic company, and as part of my job I sometimes meet with consultants or other companies that want our business. We had put something up for tender and a group of 10ish consultants came in to present. At the very start, they walked in, some shook my hand (didn't pay attention to who), and plesentaries were exchanged. They presented, we asked questions, they were done.
After the presentation small groups broke out as they were leaving where we chatted a bit more. I was talking with 5 of them 2 men, 3 women. At the end one guy stuck his hand out, so I shook it, then the next guy in the circle stuck his hand out, so I shook it, then I looked at the next person and no hand came towards me and I was like "well that's weird I guess she doesn't want to shake hands", and then we looked at each other very awkwardly and said our goodbyes, the next 2 women got the same since their hands didn't come out and I did not initiate.
This felt super awkward, and maybe I'm over thinking, but maybe these consultants get like cultural etiquette training that says ladies don't shake hands with brown dudes named Mohammed? Idk. I resolved that me as a socially awkward person would shake the shit out of any consultant ladies hand the next time this happened in case I had come across as sexist.
Lo and behold, last week I went to a conference and saw one of the same women, along with 2 guys I did not know. I walked up to the group and said hello. She introduced me to the two guys, who yes, stuck out their hand, I shook it, and they introduced themselves. I then turned to her, and no hand came out. I thought to myself "this is the moment I've been waiting for I'm going for it".
Now there are two problems at this moment. 1. If someone introduces you to two people, do you really shake the someone's hand? idk. 2. See all this over thinking I'm doing in my head? the conversation has already started.
Anyway after shaking the guys hands they asked me what I do where I work, instead of answering, I say "ummm" and stick my hand out for a handshake she looks at me like a weirdo so I say "I forgot to shake your hand" she shakes it awkwardly and says "yes good to see you again". Then the guy, who also looked at me like a weirdo reasks the question.
At least she knows I shake hands I guess?
TL;DR I didn't shake hands with all the women consultants a few months ago. I resolved that would never happen again since they might think I'm sexist. I ran into one of them again, and shook their hand mid conversation cause I'm slow, creating something even more awkward.