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The original was posted on /r/scams by /u/Ok-Philosophy9516 on 2025-07-08 13:53:13+00:00.
I met this person through a message on Reddit. I’m a gay male. He claimed to be in the military and gay as well. It started out as friendly chat between us. This person claimed he was a staff sargeant stationed in Syria. He insisted on using google chat early on. I agreed. Things were fine. His command of the English language was incredible. No weird sentence structures or odd words. Soon into our friendship, he started love bombing me. Promising to be with me when he returned home. I fell for this whole thing hook line and sinker. He was interesting, encouraging me in life and generally intelligent. We video chatted once. It had to be AI. I saw his face. But he had a thick French accent. I questioned that but he explained it away. This daily chat went on for almost a year. Me, being super trustful and naive fell for this guy. He sent photos of himself. I’m sure they were lifted from the internet.
Eventually, he would throw hints in his messages about how he needed money for a phone, food, etc. I complied. I knew in my heart this was not real but I needed something to fill a void in my life. Finally, he said he needed money for a plane ticket home. I did a stupid thing and sent him increments of money through PayPal to cover his ticket. Once that was done, he ghosted me. I feel so embarrassed and like a complete idiot. I knew this was a scam yet I played along. I lost about three grand in the course of a year.
I consider myself intelligent and of good judgement. My brain went haywire. But he was so convincing and said the right things to make me want a relationship with him. He promised me the best life ever and we made plans for our future. My emotional mind took over and blocked out my logical mind. I’m not a lonely guy. I have plenty of friends and can get dates. My question is, why did I do this? I feel like such an idiot and I knew better. I know there are tons of scams and I know the signs. Why on Earth did I fall for this, knowing it didn’t pass the smell test. I do suffer from treatment resistant depression so I’m thinking this was a diversion for me as I deal with my emotional issues. I’m so pissed at myself and could use some advice to get past this. Thanks for reading and any advice you can offer me.