this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2025
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LeopardsAteMyFace

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'I never thought leopards would eat MY face,' sobs woman who voted for the Leopards Eating People's Faces Party.

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[–] ordnance_qf_17_pounder@reddthat.com 103 points 5 days ago (1 children)

moved his wife DeAnna and three children to Russia in search of “traditional values”

Lmao, he can die a traditional manly death in combat

[–] PhilipTheBucket@quokk.au 25 points 5 days ago

There is a millenia-old tradition of these knuckleheads getting used as cannon fodder and willing slaves for whoever's willing to push the right buttons in their heads.

Back when the village was a couple of hundred people, there was a whole set of behaviors that helped knit the whole tribe together under a single coherent leadership, and it worked really well. At this point, any thinking like that that anyone's got going on is a pure liability, I think it'll get bred out over time going forward (if we make it that far.)

[–] k0e3@lemmy.ca 9 points 4 days ago

Hahaha dumbass.

[–] HappySkullsplitter@lemmy.world 85 points 5 days ago

“Unfortunately, he feels like he is being thrown to the wolves right now, and he is kind of having to lean on faith.”

Thoughts and prayers

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 65 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

"His wife DeAnna also reported that Derek and the others in his unit were forced to “donate” 10,000 rubles for their own “supplies,” which took a substantial part of his paycheck."

Trick people from the US to fight for you, make them pay for their own gear

Russia is truly a power to behold

[–] PhilipTheBucket@quokk.au 17 points 5 days ago

Somehow, I don't think signing up to take part in fighting is going to be the ticket to unquestioned respect that this guy was thinking that it would be.

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This is exactly what they wanted? They want to bomb, shoot, “pave with glass”, kill everything that offends them? Oh, of course…the “offender” shooting back is never in the cards.

As usual, it’s fine for others to suffer as long as it isn’t them. Their land of no consequences gets interrupted and then they start crying.

[–] PhilipTheBucket@quokk.au 2 points 3 days ago

It's always a part of this mentality. Wild aggression is always fine when it comes from the blessed sources, but then very mild injuries or aggressions from others cause them to flop like a soccer player and begin to shake and cry.

[–] Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca 51 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Special kind of stupid, and will be dead in a week.

[–] BaroqueInMind@piefed.social 25 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Good. Hope Ukrainian soldiers teach him a valuable final lesson.

[–] Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 6 points 5 days ago

I forgot about the sunflowers. Excellent.

[–] TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world 45 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] anon6789@lemmy.world 15 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Seriously. I read the article to see what red flags they admit to ignoring.

You get your citizenship quicker if you just enlist during this time of conscription.

Let's make you a war correspondant.

How about a combat batallion mechanic?

We'll just send you to some routine training near the front.

And they begged people for money to get the privilege of being sent here and now they have to spend it all on stuff to keep him alive in a warzone.

Between this guy and the DOGE guy that did the recent NPR interview, the amount of obvious signs of problems they wrote off is astounding.

So many chances to nope out ignored.

[–] Nougat@fedia.io 39 points 5 days ago

Derek Huffman, an American man from Texas, moved his wife DeAnna and three children to Russia in search of “traditional values”, ... The family moved to Russia in 2025 to be a part of Tim Kirby’s “American Village” project. Kirby is an American media personality who has been living in Russia since 2006 and supports Putin.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

[–] SpicyLizards@reddthat.com 19 points 5 days ago

Derek is not the first American to have misfortune in Russia in recent years.

It wasn't misfortune, it was a really fucking dumb choice.

[–] DarkFuture@lemmy.world 29 points 5 days ago

Enjoy that drone, chump.

[–] MisterOwl@lemmy.world 25 points 5 days ago (2 children)

The Texas man

That's all I needed to know. Get fucked, magat.

[–] Neverclear@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Holy regressive generalization, Batman! Leslie Cochran was a Texas man.

[–] BigPotato@lemmy.world 7 points 5 days ago

Yeah, but that's Austin. Austinites hardly claim Texas and Texans would prefer not to claim Austin.

[–] Washedupcynic@lemmy.ca 3 points 5 days ago (2 children)

While I'm not a Texas native, I lived in Dallas for 3 years. I'm not a republican nor have I sipped the maga cool-aide. Not everyone that is from, or lived in Texas has tossed Trump's salad.

[–] laranis@lemmy.zip 8 points 5 days ago

If you've lived there then you know the bell curve is weighted heavily toward magatry.

[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 8 points 5 days ago

And I know a guy in Florida who doesn't fit the FloridaMan tag, but here we are.

[–] MushuChupacabra@lemmy.world 19 points 5 days ago

I love feel-good stories.

[–] frustrated_phagocytosis@fedia.io 19 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Oh wow and he thinks Russians would accept him as their own for being a non-combatant in the military? I doubt they give a fuck less if your ass dies on the front lines but they might take your wife since you won't need her anymore.

[–] PhilipTheBucket@quokk.au 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Seriously. I actually generally really like Russians I've interacted with directly socially, but my understanding of Russian culture inside Russia is that if you're American they just don't want to have anything to do with you. It's like "You're soft and useless and you're not going to survive, so why would I make friends with you." So layer on top of that someone who moved to Russia voluntarily and then signed up to be in the military, and it's like "You're soft and useless and you're an idiot, get away from me before you infect me with whatever made you that way."

At least the North Korean fodder you can feel sorry for because you know they don't have a choice.

[–] Bebopalouie@lemmy.ca 19 points 5 days ago

A goat fart has more brains than these people.

[–] Fingolfinz@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago

Enjoy the shrapnel and getting gunned down by a drone